Judge — June 10, 1882 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

I OUR POPULAR FARCES. OUR SUMMER LANDLORD. REPORTED BY “ED.” IN TWO SCENES. CHARACTERS: The SUMMER LaxpLorp THe Summer Guest. First,—City Hotel, SUMMER LORD discovered reading paper. SCENE Laxp- [Enter Scamer Guest.) this Mr, Hayse Sununer Landlord. —A your service, sir. Summer Guest.— Summer Guest (referring to pocket-book). | an advertisement here which I cut morning's. ps —I have out ¢ lows + JUNTRY COMFORT: shioned country hor airy. Salt and fresh water bathin and milk in abundance. Spl walks, boating, mineral sp meet every train. Shade in abund Iy low, Address Propriete wo days, between 1 and Croquet Summer Landiord.—Yes, sir, tha every word of it. is true, I am the proprietor. Summer Guest.—Whereabouts is your place ? Summer Landlord. —Edenville, Ulster Coun- ty. Finest village in the county, [do not pretend to put on any Newport frills or Sara- toga gushes, I keep an old-fashioned, comfort- able sort of free-and-easy house. 1 want ni sociable people, for myself and wife are p and unostenta 4 ke boarders more for society t Summer Guest.—Do you object to c Landlord. vo. BI them, I Why, my wile fair herself he run over by the boarders’ children. Lets with croquet mal- son the tea-t Sununer Jove them. ‘em pound upon the lets, or slide down st anything. Summer Guest.—Any tishing Summer Landlord. —Didn't L put that in or do the advertisement? Summer Guest. — Sunaner Landlord, —What an Well, 1 should Stonmer Guest, —How much are omissic ing! Ay 80. our rat Summer Lavdlord.—six dolla week, How many rooms do you want? About—iet_ me see—wile and I—Richard and F > lie and Sadie, irl, Uncle Lon—say five. Summer Landlora,—How lucky. dust tive left. All the rest engaged. When can I ex- peet you? Summer Guest.—Monday night, and—say, dren fou! Summer Guest. chi nu any mo: Summer Landlore Tosquitoes, w one but in New York. T never have a Ie, with sociabil Nothing like blending busin Xeit LANDLORD ad GUEST fo beer counter, COND. — Piazza Lorp’shome, Time Enter Summer ( Summer Guest, ef SUMMER Laxp- Tuesday morning. reitedly. | 1. nice swindle. What? You and your bla Summer Landlord, ned old Summer Guest. rookery. Come out and | THE JUDGE. Hoke lup; me Summer Landlord (indignantly) do you mean, sir Summer Guest.—Just what 1 ment and your promises are | founded Ii adverti con- nmmer Landlord,—W by? Summer Guest,—You large, Why, they're e Lavullord, n't they a juest.—1 should sid your rooms were Sununer parlors. is full of he two panes « We ry? can't give you ‘The roof and a Window without at least broken glass docs not exist. Where's your salt and fresh water bathing? in’t that frog pond If you want to make it salt just t into it, Cinest.—Wii in? your barn and a of old cows, Laudlordé,—Vhat ought to be splendid for city people. [can’t bring over a mountain and put it in the back yard folks to look at. ivest.—And your romantic w Kandlord,—look at the ath. will take you right throu finest part of the bog. sceuery? nin’ A view of Lot wheat and a cou Simmer Summer Summer Stmmer Guest.—1 haven't seen the eroquet ground, Tis soon as Billy gets Summer Laudlord.—Ot course not. not made yet. But just through digging potatoes he work at it. mer Guest. ing right The mineral spring, 1 ex- Sunamer Landiord.—Well, no. Avs dried up. Summer Guest.—Where's the boating 7 Landlord.—Look at that beauti- out of Uh rdoor upon the in paddle Sum ful ratt surface of the frog pa around ail day upon it if you sod e shade ? Don't | Summer Gues', | Summer Lanator find it shady? | Summer Guest.—Shady? The desert you ahara is cool compared to this house and | grounds, T can’t s tr GRADUALLY CATCHING ON. outie wir qlang lasie night, folican man.” Bliy heailie, allie samie tkie Landlord. —You haven't ¢ down in the north meadow. fully five serub oaks there, uu have caten them up. Summer vied. There are You can go down, under them, and get all the shade you want Summer Guest.—Didu't you promise me. yourself, fishing? Summer Landlova.—I did. Summer Guest.—Where is it? Summer Landlord, —Sce that cister Summer Guest,—I do. Summer Landlord, —( fishing tack ot out your bait and Stammer Guest. —What for? Summer Lavdlo fish in the State lurking in that I put him there myself fully two ye Sununer Guest.=-Blazes! You said your dren, Ain't sh Guest. —She sh ere is the finest old ld cistern, £0. wife was fou Sunaner Lavllord, intel She threatened to throw my younge out of the window because th ereature fell down-stairs, too much of a racket. Summer ws it . child innocent little Said children made Summer Lendlord.—Oh, she was only fool Summer Guest. —1 won't stand such fooling. I intend to leave right away, —You do? ‘uest.—Yes. Lawdlord.—AM I've got your week's board abe: and take t nt fifly cents Summer kicking. ly, hiteh up the old mare to the depot. Charge 1, and a dollar for trunks. CURTAIN, ¢ idiot hankers for fame and Arctic somebody will only pay the bills, Lock him into a rettiverator and keep him there for a few days, and it will probably cure him of his iteh for Arctic fame. The citement in le the : is heginnin, ex: political part lative to But little pots boil with comicbooks.com