Judge — May 20, 1882 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

The winter hat, when it blows great quis. | MEN OB CULLOR. about do queer Chines, yery «loin’ on dis aide ob-de sea, Dey’s rehassed dat farriner in ebery kind 9 aon: So I'll tell how de cullud folk az tryin’ to get along, An’ how dey's comin’ out ahead ob all de bull creation, An’ gwine to beat de ‘Mericans in plantin’ out a natio Dr: poots told you in’ scribed his Yoas Wallt Since dey fit so glawyus in de year ob ‘sixiy- Uree, De cullad an’ de white man hab both | party free; Bot ebery year, ez time rolled ‘long dis freedom am | growed bigger, Till now FE tinks de white man don't stand nowhar side | de ier. When any shoutin’s to be did he makes de londest h An’ allas votes for any man dat pays de bi; He sits in gospel racket rooms an’ listens to de preacher, musay on Ingersoll an’ Beecher. Bat if a passon challenge him for too much ob a voter, He ‘sists «lat passon down de street jest like a Keller motor. A talkin’ "boa® theat de nigger’s allus «ar, ‘An’ if you look above you you'll see him up afar, He's a regelar attendant on six nights out ob seben, An’ takes a quarter-dollar seat up in de rs heben, A criticisin’ actors, I don't tink much 0” Booth; He ibs one chills an’ febers, like de puilin’ ob a tooth, An’ he acta 8o sort ob crazy a smotherin’ his wife When he’s de Boor 0° Venice, an’ suercides his lif We doesn't like de rumpus in which de white folks mix— { mean de fass ob Charleya wid Reb'rend Brudder Dix; An’ if de folks ob fashion keep gwine from bad to wust, Dey'd detter call at Greenwood an’ swap demselve fur dust. 1 doesn’t hke de sort ob turn dats tor Aman named Malford writ a book, Heben.” I’se neber real de wux myse what de critke said, Dat “It’s de biggest writin’ since Jupiter was dead.” I can’t ezactly see dough, what he knows ‘bout de skies, an giben! Republicans in el votes ten times a | ISTENCY. The summer hat, when all is ca'm aud still, ‘Leas he's bin up to? twice! estigute. I guess he won't <0 What fearful lot ob bodder dese Irishmen am makin'! T hope'dat Bright Queen Gladstone will gib ‘em all a ! shakin’! +-To go @ huntin’ ‘em myself I’se more dan half a notion, | Far floatin’ all deir troubles ‘cross dle big A'lantic Ocean! | rm bery fond o' masie, bat L ain't no Dreksel Morgan ‘Au’ can't pay nothin’ monstrous fur Patti an’ de onan, De sooner she gors back asin de better fo' her larder, So she'd better aail wid Rossi aboa'd de nex’ Cana | De black man am de beat to sing an’ lecture in creation! Ain't Brudder Pred'rick Douglas got ap a big sensi | tion? | By de brain widin his farhead an' luster on his He's gadderedt reputation fur all de cullud nu What's fina see? Aiy ebery solo in ‘em is jest ez black ez me! Aih't Haberly’s an’ Backus’ de greatest on de road? | An‘ ebery one am marshaled under sle darkey code, 0 de minstrels at white folks flocks to Yaas! Trabel o'er den » bigger, You'll neber find a nat ivnas till oceans am growed n equalize de nig THOMAS COMRDIOR, In Another World. BY MAJOR HL D. Me was quietly meandering down Exma- A ralda avenue—the Jupiterean Broadway. pensive air o'erspread his noble connt hance, his greasy, well-polished beaver was perched jauntily on the side of his classic head, hig recently dyed ambrosial locks well oiled and curled, his seedy Prince Albert buttoned close to chin, and his famous gold-headed cane —recently redeemed from Simpson's—carried threateningly in his right hand, and on his | left hand a white cotton glove. “Hello, Johannes! What, Count, Count Johannes—I say!" ho, Count! | ‘The majestic and knightly Count suddenly paused, struck a Richard III, attitude, and in a heavy, soap-chewing, Bowery, sepulchral | voice exclaimed ‘Varlet! why this rude, un- ! seemly interruption? What wouldst thou with me? Why this breaking in upon my silent meditations? Art one of that vile Wall street horde of cowardly idiots who in times agone did regale themselves ndiculiug mine acting, hurling ribald jokes and decayed vege: + tables at my devoted head, and outraging the feelings of the fair and tender Avonia? Out | uponye, for a base varlet? S'death, odd zooks and marry come up! What! A Scribe, a | Scribe! Aha, aha! I'll have none of ye, for ye were all base traducers and vilifiers of real histrionie genius. Begone, sirrah, begone! But stay, ye shall ynash your teeth with jeal- | ous rage and envy to witness iny greatest triumph. Tam engaged as leading tragedian, the star par excellence of the Olympian ‘Tem- ple, the great Jupitercan Theater. To-night Ishall enact Julius Caesar. Come and see me. Fail not, at thy peril!” And the noble Count strode away with all the majesty of Hamlet's ghost. ‘Truc to promise, I attended the Count’s opening night at the great Olympian Temple. Ye gods! what a scene! An audience of filly thousand delighted Jupitereans (they do things on a big scale up there) had assembled to greet the great actor. ‘Midet brilliant pyro- technics, booming of cannon, peals. of music, | and showers of bouquets, the great Count made his graceful and dignified entree. Pla ing one hand upon his manly bosom, he proud- ly bowed his acknowledgments. Cheer upon cheer grected his appearance, So great was the enthusiasm that the audience rose en musse and greeted hin with thunders of ap- | plause. And not until the agile and graceful Count. had nearly split his spinal column and doubled himself up like an animated jack-knife with excessive bowing, did his admirers pe: j mit him to proceed with the play. And what a grand and sublime performance | was given on that great occasion! The | Count was supported by Ed. Forrest, Booth the elder, J. R. Scott, Eddy, Fechter, Daven- port, Brooke, and Brougham, with Charlotte Cushman, Helen Tree, Mary Taylor, Mr: Conway, and Lanra Keene. Such sublime | acting! such scenic effects! such superb cos- tumes! “fwas indeed a feast for the gods, Our beloved Count eclipsed them all, and sus- tained his former great reputation and tame as the greatest of ancient or modern actors. Now may Salvini, Rossi, Booth, ery out with envy, and even Dr. Landis must look out for his Shakespearean laurels. If the | great Count was not duly honored and ap- preciated while upon earth, he has certainly { made his mark in the planetary world of | Jupiter, where honors and wealth are being showered upon him fast and thick. | **Who is that heroic, noble-looking in- dividual whose portrait graces the palace walls? And what sanguinary contlict does that gory scene portray?” These questions were involuntarily pro- pounded by me to a friend while rambling through the palace of Jupiter, where my ni tention was almost transfixed by viewing a | -— —|