Judge — February 25, 1882 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Revised Arabian Nights. THE FISHERMAN AND THE GENIE. ‘THere was a fisherman in Bagdad who was endowed with a phenomenal trait. When he caught a trout weighing a pound, it didn’t in- crease six pounds in weight by the time he ar- rived home; and next morning, when relating his angling exploits down at the corner gro- cery more. record, Among the New Year's resolves made by this fisherman, when a young man, was one that he would not cast his line above four times a day, And, as remarkable as it may appear, he religiously adhered to this resolu- tion, This, also, is the only instance of the kind on record. There came a time, how- ever, when the fisherman deeply regretted having made this vow. When his family was small, he generally caught enough fish in four casts of his line fora mess; but when he be- came the father of fourteen children, with ap- petites as keen as a steam sausage-chopper, there was a scarcity of food. One morning, having pulled up three times without catching enough fish to flavor the pan, he was almost wild with grief. There was not a morsel of food in the house, and he was too proud to apply to a Relief whose officers were paid such big salaries t they didn’t have much to give to the poor, anyhow. He looked around for a boy witha large string of fish, whom, he hoped, might be induced to part with his catch for a few coins, but there was no such luck in store for him, It was with gloomy m therefore, that he cast his line the fourth time; but he spat on his bait, and chucked it in. Presently his cork popped under, and he gave a sudden pull, “Great Scott!” he exclaimed, at his line, his rod bending | must be a whale But when he landed the object and found that he had hooked a small copper vessel in- , the fish still weighed one pound and no It is the only instance of the kind on ocie as he tugged ec a bow, ‘it Genie. barefoot | | Then he had me cas ead of a big fish, he was naturally mad. He made a remark that a family paper wouldn't print for seven dollars and a half. He was about to give the vessel a vigorous kick, when the happy thought struck him that it might contain “bait” lost by a brother angler. He eagerly removed the seal, and applied his nose to the aperture, with the ex- pectation that he would be rewarded with an odor of Old Rye: but again he was doomed to disappointment. From the mouth of the ves- sel issued a thick smoke which mounted to the clouds, “Humph!” ejaculated the — fisherman. “Jersey Lightning, as sure as fate!” It looked as if his great expectations were about to end in smoke. The vapor gradually connected itself into ne body, and evoluted into an enormous ‘The fisherman was terrified, and if he had not been a member of the Bagdad Business Men's Moderation Society, he would have concluded that he had ‘ got ‘em again. ‘The released monster at once began to make inquiries concerning a little boy named Say- mule Jtilden, The fisherman, hearing this familiar name, took courage, and said: “Thou great circus giant ! what is this thou dost speakest ofest ? Dost not know that five hundred years have elapsed since Jtilden wa: a boy? He is now one of our oldest inhabi- tants, and wants to be proclaimed King of Bagdad. Tell me your story, and I'll write it up for the New York Herald, get five hun- dred sequins for it, and go snacks with you.” The Genie gave the poor fisherman a threat- ening look, and said: ‘‘If thou call’st_ me a circus giant again, I'll seize ye by the sl of your neck and the scruif of your breeches, and hurl ye fourteen miles out to sea !” The fisherman timidly replied that he never knew a giant that didn’t travel with a circus, and he didn’t think a little thing like that ought to transform him into a Guiteau ofsuch horric mien, especially a3 he had delivered him from a very contracted living tomb. “Listen to me,” said the Genie, making a noise throat; “five hundred years ago I offended the great prophet Ven Noir, and he ordered me to be seized and brought before him. The summons was obeyed, and I told him td his face that as a weather prognosticator he was a greater failure than a Kentucky goose- bone. He told me to shut up. I made an impertinent retort. Then he shut me up. He shut me up in the vessel from which you have just released me, and sealed the cover on with lead-—just as if I had been a can of pre- served gooseberries put up by his wife. into the sea. The po- lice, as usual, were not about when wanted. “During the first century of my imprison ment, I swore that if any one would deliver me I would make him so rich that the house he would build would make Vanderbilt’s new residence look like a cow-stable in comparison. During the second, I vowed that I would give all the mines in the world to any one who should set me free. In the third, I promised to make my deliverer a mighty prince whom ‘Society’ would lionize even greater than if he were an Osear Wilde, and with whom all ke shect-iron thunder in clearing his the young ladies in the land would fall in love and beseech for his autograph.” “Well,” thought the fisherman, “I'm mighty glad I didn’t fish you out during the third century, anyhow.” “Century after century went ringing down the corridors of time,” continued the Genie, “and I was still a prisoner. At last long con- finement transformed me into ademon, and I swore that the man who set me at liberty | should dic like a dog. Therefore, you must die, and no postponement on account of the weather.” ‘The poor fisherman, not having his life in- sured for 30,000 sequins, was not prepared to dic, and told the giant, with some fecling, that he was real mean, and he didn’t believe his statement was founded on facts. “Your story that you were sealed up in that small vessel for several centuries, without food or drink, is too diaphanous, as the prophet says. Such a feat would out-Tanner ‘Tanner by a large majority. If you will con- vince me that you are not the composer of circus posters, by re-entering the vessel, I will willingly go hence and join the silent majority forthwith.” The Genie was disposed to be obliging, and at once began to dematerialize. He dissolved into a mist, until he became missed, then the fisherman knew he was again in the vessel. “ Wonderful!” exclaimed the angle Hel- ler is nowhere! Barnum could afford to pay the fellow $500,000 a year to travel with his show!” “Well,” came a guttural voice from within the vessel, ‘ what do you think about it now? Do you believe that I am in here?” “Yes,” replied the fisherman, with a chuckle, shutting down and sealing the cover, “and I believe you are going to stay in there for a considerable long length of period. Now I'll put you in your little bed in the river, and post a notice on the shore, warning other fishermen to beware of the vessel which pulleth the cork under like a whale, and is filled with an ungrateful monster; for at last he killeth his best friend.” The Genie exerted all his strength to burst the cover off his prison, but in vain. Then he prayed the fisherman to re- lease him once more, promising to make him very wealthy. The fisherman, instead of heed ing his entreaties, reviled him bitterly, He called him an exaggerator, a in, an wsthete, and other opprobrious names, “If I were to restore you your liberty, you would serve me as the Grecian King did Douban,” he said. Then the fisherman told the Genie a story of ingratitude, After listening half an hour, the occupant of the vessel cried for mercy, “Go hire a hall!” he urged. “Publish the remainder in a ten-cent library!” But the fisherman continued until the Genie impor- tuncd him to hurl the vessel fourteen hundred miles out to sea. The story had a big moral at the end, and the Genie was nearly pros- trated when it was finished. ‘Don't treat me,” he faintly pleaded, ‘as Imama did At- teca.” “Who's Imama? and how did he treat At- teca?” asked the fisherman, his curiosity aroused. comicbooks.com