Judge — January 14, 1882 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE JUDGE PUBLISHING CO, CO,, | Nos. 13 & 15 PARK ROW, N. Y. PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO 6 ERS. Usrren Staves wy ¥, for 13 weeks . fea rostaon runt. “oo Addiross Tie Senor Peatisiina Co, 13.415 Park Row, N.Y John Kelly on Skates. skateth own, 2 wind signs may not Axo now around atte Phe ice is very s is blowing a gale. be up, but there the briny deep m are 30 elegant and so nev bea pity to get them wet you think, a bright little cherub up alot looking out for poor Jack, but what a te ble thing it would be for you, John, if ths sweet litle creature were to be taken al in the bloom of his youth! With your Gra ys, boyds, Treanors, Brownings, Bog the g entle John Kells shion peculiarly ippery, John, and th The dang black water ahead, and y claim you, Your John, that it would There may be, | a athers Murphys, and the rest of your boys in the Legislature, and with your “ Billy” as president of the Board of Aldermen, and | acting Mayor in the absence of Mr. Grace, the whole world may look like a tof ice to you, Skate on, happy Jolin, who wish you well, but are regiments of shore who Sauer smooth are those there the are ul men on 1 plunge into the pecting to see y ck water. Very Uncivil to the Service Gop bless us! but ean this be the same God Orth, of Ohio, who, on account of certain official matters better not mentioned, found it both advisable and judicious to resign the Austrian Mission a few years ago, and retire temporarily into political dry dock? Can this he the same Orth, we inquire, who has just heen made Chairman of the Civil Service Ri form Committee of the House ? One can hard- ly eredit the report, but it is so set down by the newspapers in plain black and white, Figurer-vous the expression facial of Messrs, Curtis, Baton hurz and ot members of the Old Ladies’ Reform Tea Party when they come to hea Setting up Orth forsooth! Well, if this isn’t gether too utterly utter for uttermost ultima thule, r the news! reformer, Wicked West. Tue duly accredited Right Honorable Min- ister Plenipotentiary and Envoy Extraordi- nary of Her Most Parsimonious Majesty, Vie- toria I., to these highly moral United States | this pother THE JUD breeze in Washington society his own ‘nuous confession, Mr. Lionel Sackvill naughty diplomat, This in- tellectual bachelor (with the Villiard-ball | |! in his career and travels loved sconce) I rathe and he nsiderable purps k enough to extend a futher’s and sympathy to children born out of wedlock, Now that Mr. West ha vory Spanish feline out of the | | discretion, ther« ackle and twitter: | it ng the grand dames at the Capital, and their virtuous indignation has quickened the pulse of Knickerbocker propriety. Mur- ray Hill actually dlutters in expectaney. ‘The question is asked, with bated breath, “Will this bold, unblushing Britisher be ree into the best cireles, and our sons and daugh- ters insulted by the presence of his ill oitspring?” : is tempted to antici- pate More than likely.” All ut after the offender had truth, recognition an un: ag of is much ¢ itimate and respond >ppe manfully told the had not vidual he is bulletined in England's blue book, he might liberately Ti duced his children as his nephews or nic Society would have least not comp! The fi have « 1, and intro- cn nicely bamboozle mised or stultified. tis, that in this affair Americ: ety tries to walk a tight rope of decorum without thebalance-pole of common sense. It yale tr cize diplomat West and mak at his innocent progeny, but all the same, our money-padded aristocracy will ‘on honoring the most hypocritical roues and infamous that ever disg semblance of manhood. Forewarne transgressor, Society may in th Lon the line, and, in ninety-nine other ses most egregiously slacken it. Is it not ble that Mr. West may, with commend- , put the question and its solution to one side, and his personal feelings in his vest pocket? Lethim leave Society to its blunders and gossip, and console himself by hobnobbing with Secretary Frelinghuysen and other states- men of accident. ced the by the draw seducers prot able t. Guiteau’s “Lady” Admirers. WE are informed by th who write the ated Press accounts of the Guiteau trial and the romantic episodes of career in jail that the ‘ ladies” are just now taking a deep intercst in him, It is not a new thing for “ladies” to a deepalyed murderer when he is in paying the penalty of his life for « crime, _We can recall 1 men whose hands were stained with the blood of a fellow creature have had flowers strewn in their paths from the jail to the court-room from the fair hands of “ladies ruined their complexions by weeping when the wretches were sentenced to -be hanged, and who have been bowed down with’ grief when the saintly ‘monsters were swung at the end of a rope ina prison yard. All this is a ofthe history of this free land, but for the honor of American women whose hearts throbbed for poor Garfield when he was shot genial gentlemen Assoc the assassin’s ny’ instances where who of North America, has created a pungent in the Washington depot, who watched with tender eagerness for the physicians’ reports terrible and who of his condition through those many ys when his life hung by a thread, mourned his death as though he ha her, husband, or t dene L been their ther, we would have inced the stories of the visits of * ladies” to his mur as infamous libels on their x had we not read and re-read, time and gain, that the stories were but too true. What kind of “ladies” are those who smiled at his blasphemy in court, or who shake ‘an a woman who ity sit in a hands with him in jail? hopes to maintain her r court of justi ofan a that there isa a mardere Year? A ¢ of th nel enjoy an who believes n clasp hands with and wish him a happy New ly" shaking the bony ting the rest of the world to start their sockets. That any “lady” could sink so low almost passes belief. ‘The most cast inthe world would probably shrink from such a man as Guiteau, but that there a “Jadies” who flock around hit, to stile upon him, and to look lovingly upon him, is so posi- tive a fact that we almost wonder why th lightning does not strike in the right plac: just for a chang from brazen out. Wall Street Fishermen. Tue fishermen of Wall street must be an exceedingly interesting party to all mankind, and Mr, Worth presents a sketeh of them en- aged in their fav: cite pastime, Queer poles and bait they use, but then it is all true, ‘They find in the stream plenty of weak-ininded fish (suckers) that greedily snap at the tempt- ing bait, and when the eatch has bes up and sold the fishermen build for themselves lordly mansio have much purple and fine linen about the house, urrounded by all the luxuries that money can command, it I whether they ever pause in thoughts to ponder over the wrecks they have made among the men and women who have b drawn into their nets. But Vanderbilt, Gould, Sage, Field, and those who come after thea in Wall street, will, how- ever, continue to fish and succeed in catching nearly all there is inthe stream to the end of he fishermen will now and then tum ble into deep water and get drowned, but men will take their places and fish will bite for- ever, 1 strung. may be wonder their stock.jobbir ime, How about those new leaves” turned over last week? which were Do they stay “turned,” continually flopping over back Gurtrau has no_ ne of being afraid of i The devil takes care of h's own. October, 1881—‘‘John Kelly is politically 1882. dead.” ing here in Albany like a live mule.” January, “John Kelly is kick- Tue Congressional geyser is in full ope tion again, but, as usual, it is of the mud variety. comicbooks.com a