Judge — December 10, 1881 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE HONEST TARRIER. wea tarrier bowld from over the say, An’ money is what I'm most afther; Thave lived in a bog an’ slept wid a pig, Wid chickens above on the rafther. Saro I know Mickey Donovan riz tu great state An’ has house His larnin’ was se An’ LI swe an’ lands be for he didn’t know B, t, edad, be me Maker. They're 0+ cans acrass the salt waves, sir; ey a in their tists M1 plates, sir milk an’ pot Now they wants to ate tish from ‘They left a mud hovel to crass over here, Au’ Piz’s head once a ast now that they're gintlemen’s chi waa the b Bat their lies would the divil bewildher. wey eer had, Til be humble enough till me pockets are full, But Ul vote as the Micks vote, belave me; Thin won't E talk big to ler-facedd Yanks If don't, thin the divil recave me —Moxtace. OUR POPULAR FARCES. OUR RELIEF SOCIETIES. REPORTED BY ED." Seene First.—Opiice of the MetHoptst Saxc- TUARY SOCtETY FoR THE RELIEF OF THE Poor. ‘The Rev. Mr. TALLencsan at desk, Enter Starving Wipow, Kev, Mr, Halletujah.—W' you, my good woman ? can Ido tor Starving Widow.—Sir, Tam starving, and I need assistance, For I begged door todoor, Yesterday I went to the {well-fed clergyman and begged for a bite for myself and my babies. He calmly said, “I make it tice never to bestow alms indise fosters vice and en lays have Tron house of a populara poor Why do I replied In return be “Sinfulness of urages idlen you not go to that T did not gave me a tract Dancing ” and your card. Rev. Mr. Hallelujah. your name ? Starving Widow. e aid society?” any. the know « upon Indeed. May 1 ask Mrs. Misfortune. a widow, with two small children, Kev, Mr, Hallelujah, sd help? What brought you to your present pitch of poverty ? Starving Widow,—My busbar h he earned good wages, > Tam ton sir, was a mason, As su while he was alive did we want for But he was killed. Rev, Mr, Hallelujah, —Now? Starving Widow.—While working at the top of a seven-story building he turned to look ata fight in the street below. Somehow he lost his balance and fell. He was picked up a shapeless mass upon the sidewalk below. Kev. Mr, Hallelujah. Well, my good woman, I am sorry, but I can afford you no aid, Your present sad condition is due to your husband himself, He should have at- tended to his work, and not looked at a sin. ful, ungodly fight. ‘The sins of the fathers are isited upon their children—aye, verily! Here card to the Evangelical Relief Society, right around the block; they may help you. y, Twill not send you away nded. ever ght. D. Ah! How came you | THE JUDGE. ‘Tako this Revised Edition of the New | ment and study its precious contents. | | bye! | | Seene pnd. —Op} of the ENANC | Socrery, Rex. Mi CREAMCHEESE jn | | Her sad Joa. Ree | charge. in Winow. tale is patiently listened toby him. Rev, Mr, Creamcheese,—Your ease is truly pitiable. But it grieves me to state that, al- though iny heart yearns to do it, L eannot as sist you, | Starving Widow.—Why not, sir? | n. Mr. we are supported by ay appro- | priation from the eity of eight thousand dol j lars. ‘There are three salaried officers of our | society, of which, unworthily, perhaps, 1am We get twenty-five hundred dollars ‘That, as you sce, only leaves five Enter STARVING Creamcherse.—Vecause, my dear | | And that, sueh is th | cons land 1, we have Yet we turn no from o we toy ne who solicits our aid away | eck F r Annual [ Widow, me present you with copy of or pport for 1863, Starving “Where can I help? elite Society for th No. Beach str 1 will find the or of the Poor at sibly they will at- | tend to you, Scene Third.-Oice of the ISRAKLATE: ror THE Svecor or tHe Poor, Lr her tale, Rabbi Ben Levi. case which vas very SOCIETY Rant Bex STARVING Winow felis 1 in attendance, | Dot vas pad sorrowful, by the py-laws auf our you a question, Stareing Widow.—Well, | Rabbi Ben Levi. —VNas you at Starving Wider . Rabbi brew? Starving Widow. | Rabbi Ben Levi.—Nas your | uf them, Hebrews? | it vas a Bat T vas | soviety, sk wot to brew? Hen Levi, —Vas your husband a i sir, Starving Widow.—No, sir. Rabbi Ben Levi.—Dot | not able to assist you. uldles id, 1 vas ety vas for the id auf Hebrews only, But ve vos somedimes | above the consideration auf sects. You say | you vas got dwo babies? | Starving Widow,—T have, sir. Rabbi Hen Levi.—Den dake dis bicture- book, It vas galled “The Advendure | Ikey Isaacs in Jerusalem.” “und it vill pring dem ¢ 1 id. aut It vos a nice pook, at bleasure vhen. Py the vay. my woman, dere vas a relief association not far | alled the Samaritan Society. You | goes dere. Here, I gife you the address, | ene Fourth.—Rooms of the SAMARITAN | Society. Mr. JaWBREAKER, President. He listens carelessly to. the STARVING Wipow's story. Mr. Jawbreaker.—Sad state of affairs— very sad. Very grievous. Such is life. Help you if T can, Starving Widow.—Oh, thanks, sir. Mr, Jawbreaker.—But first I must ask you | afew questions. Were you ever in prison? Starving Widow,—No, sir. row up to re: | convicts, drunkards | to jad Were you ever a drunk: Starving Widow Mr, Jurcbreaker, en woman? Thank Heaven Were you ever a—a f Starving Walow. pri my through all of my trials Mr, Jawbreaker.—Wumph! 1 feel bad did hope you were an ex-convict, or ad . or a fallen woman, for I wanted to help The an only extend Sir, you in hy It me erved virtue, God's or ard Can't now, ciety forbids, W you, stitution of my so idl to ex fallen women, Have ry the City Cl this pamphlet Good book. or avhere else, Bureau, ‘Tah Read it “The Reformed Burglar, Scene Fifth —Oftice of Crty Cusnity Be ReAU. COMMISSIONER FLasi. Aster Stary ING Winow’s recitation of her rings a bell, Very int ing Clerk appears, coal to Mrs, Misfortune’s addre: Mes, Misfortune, you must leave two dollars and a half as a deposit for the safe return of the horse and wagon which carries the Widow,—But, sir, 1 haven't cont, much less two dollars and a halt, Commissioner Flash.—John, needn't that coal, Very sorry, but it tion not to send ont articles unless we re Stay, Twill a bundle of kindling wood, Widow, —Sir, kindling wood will hot appease my hunger. Commissioner Flash, The v passes belief, But stay, aly Starving a ul is our regula. eive for sit. ive you an order Starving ‘That is the way with eratefalness of th hin, indicate the door to the you all poor sur J female, (Scene Last, —The Potter's Field, in which rest the STARVING Winow and her feo babies Verdict of Coroner's Jury: © Death by Star- | vation.”) CURTAIN. ] How doth the busy Johnny K. Improve each shining hour In bouncing out of Tammi The kickers” "gs st his power! Coxcress Monda aken in connection with the other show they now have in Washington, ought to constitute an ample sou t for the District, if y of the world, = next > and, ¢ of amuseme not for the remainde Purnoy says he don't care a snap; that un vo to — with his old to be much of a shower anyway. k; it isn’t In Perhaps as a brand kicked from » considers himself fortunate, is himself the burning. “Waar makes Purroy love Kelly so?” The curtailed hundred ery, “Cause Kelly loves Purroy Was Irving Hall's reply. you know,” THeRe is one consolation for honest people who find themselves “stuck” with punched silver pieces; they can drop them into the contribution-box and send them to the heathen.