Judge — November 5, 1881 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE JUDGE. A SONG OF CHILDHOOD. (After Tennyson.) Datsty little maiden, whither would you wander? Whither from this tenement, this home where father dines? “ Miles and miles away,” said the dainty little maiden “Down among the hen-coops, cabbages, and onion fields, Carrots, and turnips, and sweet-potato vines.” Dainty little maiden, whither would yoa ramble? Whither from this lofty flat, this mansard room of ours? “Miles and miles away,” said the dainty little maiden, “Down among the toadstools, the marshes and the sereech-owls, Thistles and briars and delicate suntlowers.” INCLINED THAT WAY. A STORY FOR BACHELORS, BY “BRICKTOP.” Yes, Toft McGudgeon concluded to answer the letter signed ‘‘ Madge” out of about fifty that he had received, and this without read- ing more than half a dozen of them. He believed in a divinity that shapes our ends; he also believed more or less in first impressions, and as the reading of this par- ticular answer to his ‘ matrimonial” had im- pressed him so favorably, he resolved to at- tend to it first, believing that there wa: thing more than ordinary in the frank w thereof. And, indeed, he wasn't sure after all but that would be the best way to manage the business all through, provided this one did not fill the bill—that is, to commence to openand read again until some particular letter struck his fancy, and then follow it up before reading any more ‘Tom Tripper and the salesmen in the store where McGudgeon was and had been em- ployed so long, noticed on Wednesday morn- ing (the day appointed for the meeting at the Astor House) that the old bachelor business looking remarkably he wore a red rose in the lappel of hi thing they never observed on him before. There was a breath of Jockey Club to be caught from his clothes if you passed within yard or two of him, and yet he wore the same frown and unsociable look that was habitual to him. Bat the young fellows about the store would wink at cach other and take turns in going me- iter near the desk where he was at work, for the | purpose of finding out how good he smelled, and then comparing notes upon it, and specu- lating regarding the probable cause of this unwonted expenditnre of luxuries usually only indulged in by beaux. ‘Tom Tripper would have it that the old fel low had found a ‘‘mash” somewhere, prob- ably on the route from his boarding-house to the store, while the others made other sugges- tions, none of which were right. Fifteen minutes before eleven McGudgeon put on his hat and left the store without notic- ing any one, althongh they all noticed him, and Tom Tripper—the son of the proprietor and the only one of them, with the exception of the old bookkeeper, who had the right to | go and come at will—resolved to find out, if possible, where he was going, so he leisurely followed him. Once out of the store MeGudgeon walked with elastic strides towards the Astor House, some half a dozen blocks away, but taking the red rose from his buttonhole just before reach- ing there and holding it in his hand so as not to have it seen, This was a part of the tactics he had re- solved upon trom the first. Tom Tripper had opened his eyes regarding the answers to mat- rimonial advertisements; giving him at the same time a specimen letter that he had writ- ten for the purpose of having a “ racket,” ‘as he termed it, and McGudgeon at once began to fight shy lest he might get caught and un- wittingly answer the letter of some male joker, which might not only ruin his prospects of getting a rich wife, but his probabilities of peace thereafter at the hands of heartless tricksters. On that account he resolved to see first of all whether “Madge” was at the appointed place, wearing a white rose upon her breast, as she had agreed to do, and if so or not so, | he would retain the advantage of being un- known, and withont the emblem which was to distinguish him, he could survey the field at his leisure and in safety, for above all things , in the world that he shrank from, being ridi- | culed and laughed at he dreaded most. Going into the famous mecting place, with alpitating heart and doubt in his mind, he | first went to the office of the hotel, where he looked carelessly over the register, as though in ne that might possibly be time to conquer his agita- tion; to brace up, so to speak. ‘To tell the truth, he felt both tlustrated and sheepish, and he wanted a little rest before | facing the unknown music that might be in store for him. ‘Then after taking a toothpic at the clock, he sauntered toward the open door of the ladies’ parlor, His old tough | heart thumped under his vest as he glanced } into the room. Yes, there at the south window stood a lady wearing a white rose conspicuously upon her breast! | Her face was turned partially away from | him, and he could not see exactly how young and comely she was, but he saw enough at asty glance to convince him that she was far from bad-looking, and possessed a plump round figure, encased in wellfitting garments, | ‘This was enough, but he stole one more glanee, and then walked down the corridor, where he placed the red rese in his button- hole again, after which he walked back and nervously entered the parlor, marching di- rectly towards her, hat in hand. She turned and started, but instantly recoy- | ering herself, she said “ Bachelor 2” “Yes; have I the pleasure of addressing ‘Madge’ 1” he stammered, bowing politely to | | her. | “You have,” and she held out a plump, | well-gloved hand, which McGudgeon took tremblingly. “Tam delighted to meet you,” but the cold and glancing old tool never so much as squeezed her hand a bit. s I am to meet you. day it is, Mr. MeGudgeon.” What a beautiful She knew “ And how queer that we should weet in this way, isn’t it?” “T—I—you—you have the advantage of me,” he stammered, as he grew red in the “Ts it possible you do not know me, Mr. McGudgeon?” and she let go a cheery little laugh that somehow struck him as being rather familiar, He looked at her curiously but inquiringly. She was wholesome to look at, but how did she know him? Confound the business, had he put his big foot into it at the very outset? “Look again,” said she, smiling sweet! but he was so dreadfully confused that he would not have known his mother had she been before him. “T—I—be good enough to—" “Can it be possible! Well, I suppose you are not used to secing me dressed, but you certainly ought to know your landlady,” said she, laughing. “What!” and McGudgeon fell back into a chair, seeming to be utterly prostrated by the blow; all broken up. “ Didn't you know me?” no, I'll be hanged if I did,” said he, gazing at her wildly, and his first impulse was to tly the place. And no wonder he did not, for her forehead was nearly covered to the eyes with a bang of blonde hair—more utterly utt and blonde than the rest of her c: lent a blush to her cheeks, and India ink had fringed her eyes, while carminc had made her lips rival the cherry, and altogether she -was wonderfully gotten up, which, of course, nearly disguised her completely, to say noth- ing of the girlish pitch of her voice and the altogether lardy-dah style of her general movement, “But who would ever have thought it was you who advertised for a wite?” she said, finally. “And who would have thought that you would have answered it?” said he, depres at- ingly. “Why not, pray? Why should I not wish for a companion as well as yourself?” McGudgeon groaned. “But of course I had no idea that it was you,” she added, half apologetically. ‘Toft McGudgeon would have given the only thousand dollars he had in the world if he had never met her, either asa landlady or asa candidate for matrimonial honors, but what was to be done, was the conundrum that his spirit now wrestled with. “And yet I trust you are not offended,” she finally said, throwing a measure of pathos into her voice. “Oh, that is—why, certainly not, you are not to blame, of course, but” and he hesitated. “But what, Mr. McGudgeon?” she asked, looking tenderly into his eyes. “Well, you see I have an object in getting married,” he managed to falter out. comicbooks.com