Famous Funnies #7 (1935)

In a lighthearted twist on the classic tale, Jo is smitten with Priscilla but too shy to confess, so he asks Miles Standish to speak for him—only to find Miles is just as awkward. The story unfolds with playful banter and comedic missteps as the two men navigate their feelings, all while a mysterious bully looms nearby.

In a humorous twist, the legendary Hercules returns from his mighty feats—conquering armies, slaying the Hydra, and escaping Circe—only to be met with scorn for failing at contract bridge, leaving him glum and overlooked. Meanwhile, in a separate, lighthearted subplot, a mischievous little boy named Joe causes chaos at home, much to his mother’s exasperated delight, as she lovingly chases him down with the tagline “I'm the happiest girl in the world!!”

Jo, stranded on a desert island for 30 years, is thrilled to be rescued—only to find civilization has moved on with radio broadcasts, vaudeville, and beer, leaving him overwhelmed by the pace of modern life. When he asks for a simple old-fashioned Seidel of Bock beer, the boys’ enthusiasm makes it clear he’s the one who’s out of time.

In "null" from Famous Funnies #7 (1935), castaways Slim and Tubby struggle to survive on the isolated Rook's island, building a fragile life amid the wild. But the enigmatic Rook watches from the shadows, quietly working to undo their efforts—leaving them to wonder if they’re truly alone, or if the island itself is against them.

In a brief, illustrated non-fiction piece from *Famous Funnies* #7, the Aztecs are noted for their large-scale human sacrifices—specifically, the staggering number of 70,000—offered to a hummingbird deity, highlighting the cultural and religious practices of this ancient civilization. The story presents this fact with a tone of historical curiosity, grounded in the period’s fascination with exotic and dramatic world cultures.