Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, March 1924 · page 49 of 71
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #57 — page 49: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This is a clever pun-based poem disguised as gossip. Rather than depicting actual people or political figures, it's a whimsical story where **all the "characters" are flowers and plants with common names**—Jack-in-the-Pulpit, Johnny-Jump-Up, Maiden Fair, Blue Bonnet, Dutchman's Britches, Bachelor Buttons, Lady Fingers, and Morning Glory. The "scandal" is Johnny-Jump-Up kissing Maiden Fair in the woods. The humor lies in the double meanings: the flower names create an absurd melodrama of neighborhood gossip, while the adults' dialogue (Johnny's father suggesting it's "Morning Glory" instead, warning not to "Lilac that") employs botanical puns as euphemisms for indiscretion. The accompanying poem "Forgive and Forget" suggests the moral: overlook transgressions rather than harbor resentment. This appears to be lighthearted satire of small-town busybodies and gossip culture, using nature wordplay for family-friendly humor typical of *Whiz Bang* magazine's comedic style.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
44 Captain Billy's Whiz Bang A Woodland Scandal I strolled into the woods one morn To free myself from care. I was sick of city gossip And longed for country air; Imagine my surprise to find The woodland folk upset— I had walked into a scandal The worst that I've heard yet. Jack-In-the-Pulpit spread the news, How on the night before, He had heard a gentle noise outside, And on going to his door Saw Johnny-Jump-Up in the yard Kissing a Maiden Fair, And lying in the moonlight was A girl's Blue Bonnet there. He found his Dutchman's Britches were Well mended of their tear; His Bachelor Buttons well sewed on, His Moccasins on a chair; Traces of Lady Fingers about The room came into view, The neighbors hurried in by Flox To see what they should do. "Tell your Poppy," said Johnny's dad, And Johnny told his story. "Don't Lilac that," his father said, "I'm sure it's Morning Glory;" Tulips of Johnny never moved; He vowed he'd never tell, The name of her who shared his guilt In the peaceful woodland dell. *** Forgive and Forget Forgive and forget—it is better To fling every feeling aside, Than allow the deep cankering fetter Of revenge in thy breast to abide. Though thy spirit swell high with emotion To give back an injustice again, Let it sink into oblivion's ocean, For remembrance increases the pain.