Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, August 1922 · page 37 of 67
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #36 — page 37: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from the satirical magazine presents moral commentary through conversational pieces rather than visual cartoons. The opening monologue depicts a fallen woman justifying her life choices, implying she did her best under men's manipulation. The piece critiques double standards—men control women's circumstances yet judge them harshly. A middle section cites travel writer Beatrice Grimshaw's claim that New Guinea women sell for seven pigs, using this to make a crude joke about the magazine's farm and comparative worth. The final section attacks moral self-righteousness. The author argues that "moral prigs" who boast of always telling truth are worse than liars—they weaponize honesty cruelly. Instead, he champions "vitality" and compassion: kindly lies that preserve dignity matter more than brutal truths. The piece defends warmth and generosity as superior moral values to rigid truthfulness. The overall tone is cynical, irreverent, and challenges conventional morality—typical of *Whiz Bang's* provocative satire.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang 35 SHE was a beautiful golden haired Goddess in form; but her sins were seventy times seven. The trail she had traveled had been edged with primroses and poppy flowers until it neared the end, where it became very unlovely. And this night she sat beside me in a wattled house of—well, you know. “I ain’t never been one of those shut-in dolls before,” she said. “But I’ve done the very best I could. I’ve been as good and done as well as men would let me. They have lied and lied to me and I suppose they couldn’t help it sometimes, but it made things bad for me a lot.” * * * ACCORDING to Miss Beatrice Grimshaw, the intrepid traveler among the Papuan cannibals, in New Guinea a girl can be bought for seven pigs. But, of course, they are not the size of the pigs that are hand-raised on the Whiz Bang farm. * * * THERE are about us a class of moral prigs who boast of the fact that they always tell the truth. I would rather be damned for telling a kindly lie and saving a heart from bitterness, than saved for telling a cruel truth. I am not exploiting the liar. He is a scourge. I am damning the ten-caliber, putrid-moral aristocrat. Vitality is goodness and truthfulness. To burn the spark of your life so that people and all things radiate toward you and warm their hearts in the wake of your love