Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, April 1922 · page 60 of 67
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #32 — page 60: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from the satirical magazine contains several brief jokes and quips typical of early 20th-century American humor: **"Simple Arithmetic"** mocks large families and photography pricing—a photographer charges "$18 a dozen," making Deacon Jones's eleven children one short of a "dozen," so he can't afford the bulk rate. **"A Chafing Dish"** is an Irish-dialect joke playing on class aspiration: a chafing dish (a heating device for keeping food warm, associated with refined dining) is humorously defined as a "frying pan that's got into society"—suggesting upward mobility through mere pretense. **"The Bull Colossal"** appears to be poetic filler, referencing Taurus (the constellation/zodiac sign). The remaining items are brief one-liners about barber shops, billiards, and union membership—the last joke playing on "shavers" (barbers) and childhood. The humor is gentle, domestic, and reflects period anxieties about class, family size, and labor unions rather than sharp political satire.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Captain Billy’s Whiz Bang 59 Simple Arithmetic Deacon Jones recently flivvered his eleven children to our village photographer. “How much you charge for a photograph?” he asked. “Eighteen dollars a dozen,” replied the cam- eraman. “Good-bye,” said Jones, as he hustled his youngsters outside, “I’ll be back next year.” * * * A Chafing Dish “Phat’s a chafing dish?” asked O’Brien of O’Toole. “A chafing dish,” answered O’Toole to O’Brien, “is a fryin’ pan thot’s got into society.” * * * The Bull Colossal In rage the bull colossal rears His giant form against the god, Well, Taurus, well thou spurn’st the sod In that huge plunge of million years. * * * It takes a diplomat to enter a barber shop and come out with no more than he went in for. * * * I hate to play billiards with three balls as I dislike to make fun out of any one’s business. * * * The great man waved aside all objections. “Let ’em in,” he cried, pointing to a delegation from the barbers’ union. “I knew ’em when they were little shavers.”