Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, April 1922 · page 31 of 67
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #32 — page 31: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from the satirical magazine contains several short humorous pieces typical of early 20th-century American comic magazines: **"What Is All the Noise About?"** — A joke about a barber arguing with himself while shaving, attempting to convince himself to get a massage. **"Blank Verse"** — A darkly comic poem about a shipyard worker who worried about injuring a baby, only to have the child hit over the head with a bottle at its baptism, then later pelted with dirt at church. The humor relies on absurdist irony and the contrast between parental worry and slapstick violence. **"Back Porch Cross Fire"** — Women gossiping about a fire downtown, using period-appropriate exclamations. **"The Penalty"** — A moralistic verse claiming men suffer equally from wine (headaches) and women (heartache). **"I never looked up my family tree..."** — A self-deprecating joke equating oneself to sap (the weakest part of a tree, suggesting stupidity). The humor is largely observational and relies on wordplay, absurdity, and domestic comedy rather than political satire.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang 29 What Is All the Noise About? The barber is shaving himself. But why the argument? He is trying to talk himself into having a massage. * * * Blank Verse He had worked six months In a ship yard, And was worried For fear they would hurt The baby, The day of the Baptism When they hit him, Over the head with the bottle. * * * He went in to church the first time and they threw water on him; the second trip they threw rice on him; the third time was the charm; they threw dirt on him. * * * Back Porch Cross Fire “Fire, Fire,” said Mrs. McGuire. “Where, Where?” said Mrs. Blair. “Downtown,” said Mrs. Brown. “S’ help us and save us,” said Mrs. Davis.” * * * The Penalty Between women and wine A man is not so smart, For wine makes his headache, And women his heart. * * * I never looked up my family tree but I know that I’m the sap.