Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, March 1922 · page 30 of 68
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #31 — page 30: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several brief jokes typical of the 1920s-era satirical magazine. The humor relies on wordplay and social observations: **"The Fireless Telephone"** plays on heavenly/hellish greetings ("Hell-o" vs. "Hal-o"). **Fashion joke** mocks women's fashion trends of the era—"piled up hair and shoulders bare / And vertebrae all in a row," likely referencing the flapper style with bobbed hair and exposed backs. **The miners anecdote** jokes about rough mining culture: a miner's heavy "hob-nailed shoes" accidentally punch holes in a meal ticket like a time card. **"Sandy Lost His Ball"** is a Scottish dialect joke where a devoted golfer is absent from the course—his golfing companions assume illness, but he's simply lost his golf ball, treating it as a tragedy worthy of skipping his morning routine. The final line expresses bewilderment at irrational behavior—comparing a "locoed" (crazed) cow to a lovesick man as equally incomprehensible.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
28 Captain Billy's Whiz Bang The Fireless Telephone In Hades: "Hell-o!" In Heaven: "Hal-o!" * * * "Were you ever pinched for going too fast?" "No, but I've been slapped." * * * "Mary, Mary, slightly airy, How do the fashions go?" "Piled up hair and shoulders bare And vertebrae all in a row." * * * "Sir," writes a correspondent, "When I was in Butte I dropped my meal ticket on the floor and one of those miners with hob-nailed shoes stepped on it and punched out a week's board." * * * Sandy Lost His Ball Sandy McDugal was a great golf enthusiast. In many months he never missed a morning. Then the inevitable happened—Sandy was ab- sent. His fellow golfers, worried lest Sandy be ill, sought him out. They found the old Highlander in appar- ently good health. Sandy refused to explain his absence from the course until after vigor- ous questioning. "Weel," drawled Sandy unwillingly, "if ye must know, I lost me ball." * * * There are two things that I can't under- stand. A locoed cow and a love-sick man.