Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, March 1922 · page 28 of 68
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #31 — page 28: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three brief satirical jokes typical of 1920s American humor magazines: **"This Ain't Very Hot"** mocks miserly grooms—a man gives his bride a nickel's candy and a trolley ride honeymoon, then wants to save the candy "for the children," suggesting stinginess even on his wedding day. **"Lampoon's Stuff"** describes a seduction on a Boston trolley (references to Park, Kendall, Central, and Harvard suggest actual Boston locations). The humor relies on a double standard: the man keeps "notches" (conquests) while the woman loses her watch, with both attributing success to different reasons—suggesting sexual double standards and male conquest culture. **"Fido, Quit Your Pekin"** is a pun on "Peking" (Beijing). The joke: Marie is so modest she removes her *Pekingese dog* while undressing—playing on the phrase "Pekinese" sounding like "peek-at-these." The final aphorism mocks passive people versus thinkers—mild social commentary typical of the era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
26 Captain Billy's Whiz Bang This Ain't Very Hot The Meanest Man bought his bride a nickel's worth of candy as a wedding present, then took her on a trolley ride honeymoon. After they got off the car he said, “Let’s save some of that candy for the children.” * * * Lampoon's Stuff He got on at Park and sat in the last car. She got on at Park and sat in the last car. When he went over the bridge he smiled. She laughed aloud. At Kendall she crossed her legs. He crossed his fingers. At Central he had her phone number. She had his watch. When they reached Harvard he offered to take her home. He kissed on the front porch. Then he went back to Ridgely Annex and cut one more notch in his shoe trees. “I guess it’s my personality,” he thought as he tumbled into bed. “I guess it’s my smile,” she thought as she tumbled into bed. * * * Fido, Quit Your Pekin “Marie is so modest she puts her pet dog out of the room while she is changing her gown!” “The idea!” “Well—it’s a Pekingese.” * * * There are two classes of people: those who sit and think, and those who sit.