Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, February 1922 · page 56 of 68
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #30 — page 56: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three brief humorous pieces typical of 1920s satirical magazines: **"Dope This One"**: A joke where the punchline is censored (marked with *). A city man asks a farmer why he locks up his donkey so carefully. The farmer's reply—"Because it is too good an *"—appears to be an off-color or risqué joke, with the offensive word redacted, likely referring to the donkey's sexual prowess or desirability. Readers were expected to fill in the blank themselves. **"Hiawatha Skinned a Squirrel"**: A tongue-twister poem mocking the literary style of Longfellow's "Song of Hiawatha" through absurdist repetition about making mittens with paradoxical inside-outside positioning. It's nonsense designed for comedic effect and difficulty in recitation. **"They don't look natural"**: A brief joke about rolling dice—a man rolls two threes (sixes would be "snake eyes," considered lucky or suspicious), and complains they look unnatural, implying the dice are loaded. All three pieces target audience participation or contain double meanings meant for adult readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
54 Captain Billy's Whiz Bang Dope This One After Theophile returned to the city he wrote to Farmer Si Hopkins concerning a ques- tion which has been puzzling him for some time. “Why,” he inscribed, “do you lock up that donkey of yours so carefully every night?” In due course of time came Farmer Hopkins’ reply. “Because it is too good an *.” * * * Hiawatha Skinned a Squirrel Hiawatha skinned the squirrel, Just sat down and went and skinned it; Went and skinned it to a finish, From its skin he made some mittens, Made them with the outside inside, Made them with the inside outside, Made them with the fur side inside, Made them with the skin side outside, Made them with the warm side inside, Made them with the cold side outside. Had he placed the fur side outside, Had he placed the skin side inside, Had he placed the outside inside, And the inside inside Then the warm side would have been outside, And the cold side inside, So to get the fur side, warm side inside, Placed the skin side, inside, outside. Now you know why Hiawatha placed the outside, fur side, warm side, inside, and the inside, skin side, cold side, outside. * * * For when the One Great Scorer comes to write against your name He writes not that you won or lost, but how you played the game. * * * “They don’t look natural,” said the man, as he rolled two threes.