Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, January 1922 · page 63 of 68
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #29 — page 63: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains a humorous short story from *Captain Billy's Whiz Bang*, a 1920s American satirical magazine known for risqué jokes and comedic fiction. The joke is a classic case of mistaken identity during a romantic moment. A man dances with a woman he believes is "Kathleen," delivering increasingly overwrought romantic declarations—comparing her to sprites, suggesting the universe was made for this moment, claiming she *is* his whole world. The humor builds through his theatrical, exaggerated passion. The punchline: both parties realize they've been kissing and confessing love to complete strangers. Neither is who the other thought. This satirizes the earnest, flowery romantic rhetoric common in sentimental fiction of the era, mocking how easily passionate declarations can occur between people who don't actually know each other—suggesting that intense romantic feeling can be based on circumstance rather than genuine connection. The absurdist reversal was typical humor for *Whiz Bang*.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang 61 "Kathleen!" I exclaimed, half aloud, and advanced. "May I break?" I asked, and took her into my arms. Her dancing—how can I describe it? She moved like some sprite—sure-footed languorous, as light as a summer cloud. Drawing her to me, I suited my steps to the slow, yearning melody of the waltz. As we glided in the semi-darkness, oblivious of the passing couples she pressed her glowing cheek to mine and breathed quickly. "Oh"— "Sweetheart, why cannot I hold you like this forever? I feel that you are a part of my very soul!" "Hold me—oh, hold me tight!" "I have lived always for this moment. Dearest, you are the only girl in the whole world—you *are* the whole world"— And there, our eyes closed in ecstasy, I kissed her. "I love you! The universe was made for the rapture of this moment. The stars have shone in vain for ages that they might light your eyes now! All time has been but a prelude to this second! Say you love me! Just say it!" "Oh, Jimmy, you know I do!" "Why, Kathleen, this isn't Jimmy!" I cried. "And this isn't Kathleen," replied the stranger.