Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, May 1921 · page 28 of 68
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #20 — page 28: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two separate jokes from *Captain Billy's Whiz Bang*, a WWI-era satirical magazine. **"Parley Vouz?"** plays on officers stationed in France during WWI taking French lessons—ostensibly for language training, but clearly using them as pretexts for dating French women. The joke's humor lies in the major's deflection: when asked to calculate costs "respectably" rather than "roughly," he dodges the question, implying the real expense is romantic rather than educational. **"Shocking!"** mocks a second lieutenant's inattention during a military tactics class. The instructor poses a scenario about encountering "two young ladies" in enemy territory during a training exercise. The officer's response reveals he wasn't paying attention—but his final question about whether the corn was "shocked" (bundled for storage) suggests he's either deliberately deflecting or genuinely missing the point of the tactical problem entirely. The humor targets military incompetence and distraction, likely reflecting frustrations with hastily-trained officers during wartime.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
26 Captain Billy's Whiz Bang Parley Vouz? Several officers were seated around the mess table in France. One serious-minded major was in habit of taking a French girl out to lunch two or three times per week and taking a French lesson afterward. “How much do you figure your French lessons have cost you to date?” queried one of his companions, winking around the board. “Roughly?” asked the major. “No, respectably.” * * * Shocking! My brother Roscoe, who is a captain in the Air Service, tells the following: Officers in a garrison school were studying “Small Problems for Infantry.” Turning to the large-sized map on the wall, the major instructor called upon one officer, Jones by name. “Jones,” said he, “your battalion is camped here at cross-roads 435 (indicating on map). It is enemy country and you are told to cross this cornfield toward farmhouse half-mile distant for the purpose of bring- ing in the farmer or somebody who might furnish information of the movements of the enemy. It is in September, the corn is cut but not shocked, and as you make your way across the field you suddenly run into two young ladies. What do you do?” “I-I-I don’t know,” falteringly replied the sec- ond looey. “I didn’t get time to study the lesson today. But, did I understand you to say that the corn had not been shocked?”