Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, January 1921 · page 49 of 68
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #16 — page 49: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Captain Billy's Whiz Bang* contains three humorous pieces reflecting 1920s American culture: **"Police Inspection"** satirizes Prohibition enforcement. A speakeasy (illegal bar) hides in a cellar; patrons fear police ("copper") raids. The barmaid asks if she should let the "cuckoo" (police) in—dark humor about the constant cat-and-mouse game between bootleggers and law enforcement during the Prohibition era. **"How Old Is Ann?"** is a riddle-poem playing with anatomical puns ("cap for his knee," "calf of his leg," "palm of his hand")—absurdist wordplay typical of the era's humor magazines. **"The Bachelor's Dream"** expresses nostalgia for pre-modern dancing and women. It critiques contemporary dance crazes (turkey-trot, wiggle-tail slide) as too risqué, requesting a return to "genuine" modest women—reflecting anxieties about changing gender norms and the "New Woman" of the 1920s. The overall tone is bawdy, irreverent satire targeting Prohibition, modern social change, and contemporary morality debates.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang 47 Police Inspection We were crowded in the cellar, Not a soul would dare to sleep, It was midnight in the barroom And Old Joe lay in a heap. As we huddled there in darkness, Each one seeing snakes and bears, “They’re all drunk,” the barkeep shouted, As he staggered down the stairs. But his little barmaid whispered, Passing him a quart of gin: “There’s a ‘copper’ at the back door, Should I let the ‘cuckoo’ in?” * * * How Old Is Ann? By Billy Bea Where can a man buy a cap for his knee? Or a key for a lock of his hair? Or can his eyes be an academy Because there are pupils there? In the crown of his head, what gems are found? Who travels the bridge of his nose? Does the calf of his leg get hungry at times And devour the corn on his toes? Can the crook of his elbow be sent to jail? Where’s the shade from the palm of his hand? How does he sharpen his shoulder blades? I’m tammed if I understand. * * * The Bachelor’s Dream Then give us the dances of days long gone by, With plenty of clothes and steps not so high; Oust turkey-trot capers and buttermilk glides, The hurdy-gurd twist and the wiggle-tail slide. Then let us feast our tired optics once more On a genuine woman as sweet as of yore; Yes, Time, please turn backward and grant our request For God’s richest blessing—but not one undressed.