Captain Billy's Whiz Bang, January 1921 · page 31 of 68
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang #16 — page 31: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**"Fast Workers"** satirizes post-WWI dating culture and casual romance. The humor centers on how quickly two people move through relationship stages (introduction to kissing) in under three hours. The satire targets both parties' self-deception: he keeps notches on his brushes (implying serial conquests) while believing himself a "handsome devil," and she maintains a "thick little book" of names since age sixteen, convinced she's "sweet and delightful." Both are performatively romantic yet cynical—treating the encounter as a conquest rather than genuine connection. The piece mocks the era's rapid courtship rituals and the vanity of both sexes. **"Shortcomings"** is a racial stereotype joke relying on dialect humor common to 1920s publications. The punchline plays on the double meaning of "come up to"—the clerk interprets it as meeting expectations, while the customer means the stockings literally don't reach high enough on her legs. The humor depends entirely on racist caricature and dialect representation.
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Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Captain Billy's Whiz Bang 29 Fast Workers They were introduced at 7:15. By 8:10 they were talking cozily in a movie. At 9:30 they were regarding each other intimately over the remains of a chicken sandwich. At 9:44 they stood wistfully near on the front porch. Promptly at 9:45 he kissed her. By 9:50 she kissed him. At 10:00 with a touch of sadness they parted. He walked down the steps dejectedly, but upon hearing the door close, he snapped out and walked briskly home and cut another notch in his military brushes. “How they fall,” he murmured, “probably I am a handsome devil.” She, sitting before her dressing-table, yawned. “How they fall,” she sighed; “perhaps I am a sweet and delightful girl.” And she put his name in a thick little book she had been keeping since she was sixteen! * * * Shortcomings A negro woman went into a department store and said to the clerk: “Mister, can I exchange these stockings?” “Why, certainly, madam; don’t they come up to your expectations?” “Lawdy, no; dey hardly come up to ma knees.”