Beadle's Half Dime Library, No. 9 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

when we found ourselves serenaded by at least one thousand lions, approaching equally on every side, and within a hundred paces. Our cattle showed the most horrible symptoms of fear, all trembling, and in cold perspiration. I directly ordered the whole company to stand to their arms, and not to make any noise by firing till I should command them. I then took a large quantity of tar, which I had brought with our caravan for that purpose, and strewed it in a continued stream round the encampment; within which circle of tar I immediately placed another train or circle of gunpowder; and aving taken this recaution, I anxiously waited the lions’ approach. hese dreadful animals, knowing, I presume, the force of our troop, advanced very slowly, and with caution; approaching on every side of us with an equal pace, and wling in hideous concert, so as to resemble an earthquake, or some similar convulsion of the world. When they had at length advanced and steeped all their paws in the tar, they put their noses to it, smelling it as if it were blood, and daub- ed their great bushy hair and whiskers with it equal to their paws. At that very instant, when, in con- cert, they were to give the mortal dart upon us, I discharged a oe at the train of gunpowder, which instantly exploding on every side, made all the lions recoilin general uproar, and take to flight with the utmost precipitation. Inan instant, we could behold them scattered through the woods at some distance, roaring in agony, and moving about like so many Will-o’-the-Wisps, their paws and faces all on fire from the tar and the gunpowder. I then ordered a eneral pursuit: we followed them on every side through she woods, their own light serving as our guide, until, before the rising of the sun, we followed into their fastnesses and shot or otherwise destroyed every one of them:. and during the whole of our journey after, we never heard the roaring of a lion; nor did. any wild beast presume to make another at- tack upon our party, which shows the excellence of iiamediate presence of mind, and the terror inspired upon the most savage enemies by a proper and well- timed proceeding. We at le arrived on the confines of an im- measurable desert—an immense plain, extending on beak side of us like anocean. Not a tree, nor a shrub, nor a blade of grass was to be seen, but all appeared an extreme fine sand, mixed with gold- dust and little sparkling pearls, The gold-dust and rls appeared to us of little value, ause we could have no expectation of re- turning to England for a considerable time, We ob- served, at a great distance, something like a smoke arene Jas over the verge of the horizon; and look- ing with our telesco we perceived it to be a whirl- wae bpd», Sy the sand and tossing it about in the heavens wit htful impetuosity. I immediately ordered my company to erect a mound around us of a great size, which we did with astonishing labor and perseverance; and then roofed it over with certain planks and timber, which we had with us for the p se. Our labor was scarcely finished, when the cand came rolling in like the waves of the sea; ‘twas a storm and river of sand united. It continued to advance in the same direction, without intermission for three days, and completely covered over the mound we had erected, and buried us all within. The intense heat of the place was intolerable; but guessing, by the cessation of the noise, that the storm was , we set about digging a passage to the light of day again, which we effected in a very short time; and ascending, perceived that the whole had been so completely covered with the sand, that there appeared no hills, but one continued plain, with inequalities or ridges on it like the waves of the sea, We soon extricated our vehicle and retinue from the burning sands, but not without great dan- ger, as the heat was say fp and began to pro- ceed on our voyage. rms of sand of a similar nature several times attacked us, but by using the same precautions we preserved ourselves re edly from destruction. Having traveled more than nine thousand miles over this pee plain, ex to the pe dicular rays of a burning sun, without ever m a rivulet , or a shower from heaven tc refresh us, we at length became almost desperate; when, to our inexpressible joy, we beheld some mountains at a great distance; and on our nearer approach, observed them covered with a carpet of verdure, and groves and woods. Nothing could ap- pear more romantic or beautiful than the rocks and precipices intermingled with flowers and shrubs of every kind, and palm-trees of such a prodigious size as tos anything ever seen in uEOpS. Fruits of all kinds appea growing wild in the utmost abundance, and antelopes, and sheep, and buffaloes, wandered about the groves and valleys in profusion. The trees resounded with the melody of birds, and cyerysnens displayed a general scene of rural hap- piness and joy. CHAPTER XXVII. A FEAST ON LIVE BULLS AND KAVA—THE INHABITANTS ADMIRE THE EUROPEAN ADVENTURERS—THE EMPEROR COMES TO MEET THE BARON, AND PAYS HIM GREAT COMPLIMENTS—THE INHABITANTS OF THE CENTER OF AFRICA DESCENDED FROM THE PEOPLE OF THE MOON, PROVED BY AN INSCRIPTION IN AFRICA, AND BY THE ANALOGY OF THEIR LANGUAGE; WHICH IS ALSO THE SAME WITH THAT OF THE ANCIENT SCYTHIANS—THE BARON IS DECLARED SOVEREIGN OF THE INTERIOR OF AFRICA ON THE DECEASE OF THE EMPEROR—HE EN- DEAVORS TO ABOLISH THE CUSTOM OF BATING LIVE BULLS, WHICH EXCITES MUCH DISCONTENT—THE AD- VICE OF HILARO FROSTICOS UPON THE OCCASION—THE BARON MAKES A SPEECH TO THE ASSEMBLY OF THE STATES; WHICH ONLY EXCITES GREAT MURMURS—HE CONSULTS WITH HILARO FROSTICOS, HAVING yepees over the nearest mountains, we or tered a delightful vale, where we perceived a mult tude of persons at a feast of living bulls, whose flesh they cut away with great knives, making a table of the creature’s carcase; serenaded by the bellowin of the unfortunate animal. Nothing seemed requi- site to add to the barbarity of this feast but kava, made as described in Cook’s voyages; and at the conclusion of the feast we perceived them brewin this liquor, which they drank with the utmost avid- ity. From that moment, inspired with an idea of Beadle’s Half-Dime Library. * universal benevolence, I determined to abolish the | custom of eating live flesh and drinking of kava. But I knew that such a thing could not be immediately | effected, whatever in future time might be per- | formed. Having rested ourselves during a few days, we de- termined to set out toward the principal city of the empire. The singularity of our appearance was ope en of all over the country as a phenomenon. e multitude looked upon Sphinx, the bulls, the crickets, the balloons, and the whole company as something more than terrestrial; but especially the thunder of our firearms, which struck horror and amazement into the whole nation, We at length arrived at the metropolis, situated on the banks of a noble river; and the emperor, attend- ed by all his court, came out in grand procession to meet us. The emperor appeared mounted on a dromedary, royally caparisoned, with all his attend- ants on foot, through respect for his majesty. He was rather above the middle stature of that country, four feet three inches in hight, with a countenance like all his countrymen, as white as snow! He was receded by a band of most exquisite music, accord- ing to the fashion of the country, and his whole retinue halted within about fifty poms of our troop. We returned the salute by a discharge of musketry and a flourish of our trumpets and martial music, "I commanded our caravan to halt, and dismounting, advanced uncovered, with only two attendants, to- ward his majesty. The emperor was equally polite, and descending from his romedary, advanced to meet me. “I am happy,’ said he, ‘“‘to have the honor to receive so illustrious a traveler, and assure Ma ig jeoverything in my empire shall be at your I thanked his majesty for his politeness, and ex- ressed how happy I was to meet so polished and re- ned a people in the eenter of Africa; and that I hoped to show myself and company grateful for his esteem, by introdue the arts and sciences of Europe among the peop e. I immediately perceived the true descent of this ple, which does not appear of terrestrial origin, ut descended from some of the inhabitants of the moon; because the principal language ken there, and in the center of Africa, is very nearly the same. Their alphabet and method of writing are pretty much the same, and show the extreme antiquity of this people, and their exalted origin, I have sub- mitted a specimen of their characters to the inspec- tion of a celebrated antiquarian; and it will be proved to the satisfaction of every one, in his next volume, what an immediate intercourse there must have been between the inhabitants of the moon and the ancient Scythians; which Scythians did not, by any means, inhabit a part of Russia, but the central part of Africa, as I can abundantly prove to my very learned and laborious friend. The words of the spe- cimen referred to, written in our characters, are Sregnah dna skoohtop; that is, the Scythians are of heavenly origin. The word sregnah, which signifies Seythians, is compounded of sreg, or sre, whence our resent English word sire, or sir; and nah, or gnah, owledge; because the Scythians united the essen: tials of pag eA and learning together, dna signifies heaven, or belonging to the moon, from dung, who was anciently worshiped as goddess of that lumi- nary; and skoohtop signifies the origin or beginning of anything, from sxoo, the name used in the moon for a point in geometry; and /op, or hlop, vegetation. These words are inscribed at this day upon a pyra- mid in the center of Africa, nearly at the source of the river Niger; and if any one refuses his assent, he may go there to be convinced, e emperor conducted me to his court amidst the admiration of his courtiers, and paid us oe : pet sible politeness that African m ficence could be- stow. He never presumed to proceed on any expe- dition without consulting us; and looking upon us as a species of superior beings, paid the greatest re- = to our opinions. He pa gm asked me about the states of Euro the Kingdom of Great Britain, and ap lost in admiration at the account I gave him of our ship and the im- mensity of the ocean. We taught to regulate the government nearly on the e plan with the British constitution, and to institute a parliament and degrees of nobility. His majesty was the last of his royal Jine; and on his decease, with the unani- mous consent of the people, made me heir to the whole empire. The nobility and chiefs of the country immediately waited upon me with petitions, entreat- ing me to accept the government. I consulted with my noble friends Gog and Magog, etc., and after much consultation, it was agreed that I should ac- cept the government, not as actual and independent monarch of the place, but as viceroy to his majesty of England. I now thought it high time to do away the custom of eating live flesh and drinki of kava; and for that purpose used every persuasive method to wean the ma‘ority of the people from it. This, to my astonis ment, was not taken in good part by the nation and they looked with jealousy at those erate rs, who wanted to make innovations among em. Nevertheless, I felt much concern to think that my fellow-creatures could be capable of such barbarity. I did everything that a heart fraught with universal amma a ae NLL Se ee | sss =_ eee. capable of desiring. I first tried every method of persuasion and incitement. I did not harshly re- prove them; but I invited frequently whole thou- sands to dine after the fashion of Europe, upon roasted meat. Alas! ‘twas all in vain! my goodness nearly excited a sedition. They murmured amon themselves, spoke of my intentions, my wild an ambitious views, as if I—oh, heaven!—could have had any personal interested motive in making them live like men, rather than crocodiles and tigers. In fine, perceiving that gentleness could be of no avail— well owing that when complaisance can effect nothing from some spirits, compulsion excites re- Spee and veneration—I prohibited under the pain of the severest penalties the drinking of kava, or eating of live flesh, for the space of nine days, with- in the districts of Angalinar and Paphagalana. But this created such a universal abhorrence and detestation of my government, that my ministers, and even myseit were universally pasquinadoed; lampoons, satires, ridicule, and insult, were shower- ed upon the namé of Munchausen wherever it was mentioned; and, in fine, there never was a govern- ment so much detested, or with such little reason. In this dilemma I had recourse to the advice of my noble friend Hilaro Frosticos. In his good sense now expected some resource; for the rest of the council, who had advised me to the former method had given but a pe sponem of their abilities and discernment, or | should have succeeded more hap- pily. In short, he addressed himself to me and the council, as follows; “Tt is in vain, most noble Munchausen, that your Excellency endeavors to compel or force these people to a life to which the ve never been ae- customed. In vain do you tell them that apple pies, punenan roast beef, minced pies, or tarts, are de- cio at sugar is sweet, that wine is ex ite. Alas! they cannot, they will not comprehend what deliciousness is, what sweetness, or what the flavor of the CxBPO. And even if they were convinced of the superior excellence of your way of life, never, never would they be persuaded; and that, if for no other reason, but because force or persuasion is em- ployed to induce them to it. Abandon that idea for he ‘present, and let us try another method. My opissop, therefore, is, that we should at once cease all endeavors to compel or persuade them, But let us, if possible, procure a quantity of fudge from > ane ee A scat - it eg the coun- : and from this disposal of matters e, nay, Ihave a moral ee oe we Shall reolali t nee from horror and barbarity.’ Had been proposed at aiaiecher time, it would have been violently opposed in the council; but now, when every other attempt had failed, when there seemed no other resource, the majority willingly submitted to they knew not what; for Say ep eassiaer ly had no idea of the manner, the possibility of suc- cess, or how they could bring matters to bear. How- ever, ‘twas a scheme; and as such they submitted. For my I listened with ecst to the words of Hilaro Frosticos; for I knew that he had a most si knowledge of human kind, and could humor and persuade them on to their own mopaenens and universal ‘ erefore, according to the advice of Hilaro, I dispatched a balloon with four men over the desert to the Cape of Good Hope, with letters to be forwarded to England, requiring, without delay, a few cargoes of fudge. The people had all this time remained in a general state of ferment and murmur. Everything that rancor, low wit, and deplorable ignorance could conceive to asperse my government, was put in exe- cution. The most worthy, even the most beneficent actions, everything that was amiable, were perverted into opposition. The heart of Munchausen was not made of such impenetrable stuff as to be insensible to the hatred of even the most worthless wretch in the whole king- dom; and gnce, at a general assembly of the states filled an idea of such continued ingratitude, spoke as pathetic as possible, not methought beneath my dignity, to make them feel for me; that the uni- versal good and happiness of the people were all I wished or desired—that if my actions been mis- taken, or on el surmises formed, still I had no wish, no desire, but the public welfare, ete., ete. Hilaro Frosticos was all this time much disturbed ; he looked sternly at me—he frowned; but I was so engrossed with the warmth of heart, my inten- tions, that I understood him not: in a minute I saw nothing but as if through a cloud (such is the force of amiable sensibility)—lords, es, chiefs, the whole assembly, seemed to swim before m sight, The more I thought on ny good intentions, the lam- poons which so much aifected my delicacy, good- nature, tenderness—I forgot myself—I spoke rapid, violent—beneficence—fire—tenderness—.A las! I melt- ed into tears! *Pish! pish!’’ said Hilaro Frosticos! | Now, indeed, was my government lampooned, sa- tirized, carribonadoed, bepickled, and bedeviled. One day, with my arm full of lampoons, I started up as Hilaro entered the room—the tears in m _ ‘* Look, look here, Hilaro!—how can I bear all this? It is impossible to please them; I will leave the gov- ernment—I cannot bear it! See what pitiful anec- dotes—what surmises—I will make my people feel for me—I will leave the government!” ‘“‘Pshaw!"’ says Hilaro. At that single monosy]l- lable, I found myself changed as if by magic; for I ever looked on Hilaro as a person 80 experienced, such fortitude, such good sense, “There are three sail under the convoy of a frigate,’’ added Hilaro, ‘just arrived at the Cape, after a fortunate passage, laden with the fudge that we demanded. No time is to be lost; let it be immediately conducted hither and distributed through the principal granaries of ’ benevolence and good-will to all mankind could be _ the empire.” Ebooks coim