Argosy All-Story Weekly, November 13, 1920 — page 136: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

414 faces, I guess. Everybody didn’t get in on that oil boom, you know.’ | “Oil boom?’ says Jake, ‘I never heard of no oil boom. Around here, you mean?’ ‘““¢ That’s what!’ says Pharaoh. ‘I guess you must have went across just about then. Why, they found oil on, Joe Carter’s place— not so much, but it paid a darn sight better than farming.’ “¢T should smile!’ I says. ‘And Eben Morse, out Green Valley way, he’s rich. Blame near drowned in the precious fluid. But me and Pharaoh, all the oil we ever come across is what I buy in bottles to put on heads in this old dump. And from the way business is going, Pharaoh won’t be doing that much longer. It looks like Vl even have to drop him.’ ‘“ And when I says that Pharaoh jumped like he’d been stung. ‘ Heavens above, Mr. Doolittle!’ he says. ‘ You wouldn’t go and bounce a feller when he’s engaged to be married?’ ‘“““ None o’ that!’ I says. ‘ You can work that there stunt with the United States army, maybe, but it don’t bring no tears from me. I ain’t going to run this shop at a loss just so you can marry Daisy Spiffel. Not so you’d notice it!’ “< But,’ says Pharaoh, very indignant, ‘what in cats ‘ll I live on?’ _ “* Air, I guess,’ says I. ‘Or maybe you might use some of that there cash you’ve been a-hoarding in the savings bank.’ ‘“Now maybe you think I was cruel to answer him like that, but if you do, it’s because you don’t know Pharaoh Evans the way you ought. His long suit was poverty. He was always starving to death just as though his dad hadn’t left him a flock of dollars pretty near large enough to keep him. Ever since I’d met him he’d been falling in love with nickels, and going into raptures over anything bigger. He sure was tight as a drum. ‘However, if I didn’t feel sorry for Pharaoh, Jake did. Him and Pharaoh had worked alongside each other for years. But he didn’t feel as sorry for him as he did for himself. Even if Pharaoh lost his job, he had money in the bank; but jake, he only had sixty-eight cents in his pants pocket. ‘““* Look here, Pharaoh,’ he says to him, ARGOSY-ALLSTORY WEEKLY. when I’d gone off to supper, ‘ let’s me and you start «p a shop of our own.’ ‘* Huh!’ says Pharaoh with a sniff. ‘ What on?’ 7 ‘ ““What on?’ says Jake. ‘How about that there money you got in the bank? What’s the matter with that?’ ‘“* Nothing is the matter with it, I Zope,’ says Pharaoh. ‘But I don’t see myself starting you up in business with it. What do you think I am?’ “* Oh, very well,’ says Jake, ‘if you’re going to look at it that way, why, all right. But the first thing you know you'll find yourself out of work with a wife to support.’ ‘“ Pharaoh turned pea-green. ‘ Oh, I ain’t married yet,’ he growled. ““No,’ says Jake, ‘but you will be if I know Daisy Spiffel. She ain’t a going to wash dishes all her life; and I don’t blame her.’ 2 “*H-m!’ says Pharaoh, dropping into a chair and squinting sixteen ways at once. ‘Huh!’ Then, giving a groan, he got to his feet and commenced to walk up and down, his hands clutched in his hair. * Jake,’ he says, ‘I’d pretty near rather die than marry that girl, or any girl. I just can’t afford it.’ Then taking his hands out of his hair so he could wring ’em instead, he told Jake about the fix he was in. ‘ Of course,’ he says, ‘she thinks I’m going to do it, and I would ’a’ done it if the war had kept up, but now—I tell you, I ain’t a going to marry her.’ ‘“* Well, don’t look at me,’ says Jake. ‘I ain’t a going to make you. But you better think up a pretty good excuse before you tell Daisy.’ ‘““* Huh!’ says Pharaoh once more, stop- ping his floor-walking and staring at Jake as piercing as a cock-eyed feller can. ‘ Oh, hell! Ain’t it awful?’ ‘And then it was Jake told me that all of a sudden he had an idea come to him. Maybe if he got Pharaoh Evans out of his trouble, he’d agree to finance the shop they’d been talking about. ~“* Pharaoh,’ he says, ‘I got a proposi- tion to make to you. If I sidetrack Daisy Spiffel, will you put up the money to go into business together?’ | “Will I?’ says Pharaoh, looking like EOPNIC OOO KS (E@)