Argosy: The Short Story Magazine — page 29: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

EN Be ens POW ne eS arte eid gal or aes Mn es ia as — - ' - . CAT'’S-PAW 20 screamin’ at the top of ’is voice, jumped up and down like ’e were trying to pull er ’ead off. ‘“ Blimey, what a grandaddy of a barney! Lizzie were shoutin’, ‘Help! Murder! Police!’ The kids were scared out of their senses, and the wife were screechin’, ‘Do something, Charlie! do something! ’ “Well, what could I do? Every time I makes a grab at the monk ’e takes a piece outer me ’and, so in the finish I gets a bucket o’ water and lets ’em ’ave the flippin’ lot. That fixed "em, Liz an’ all; soaked the pair of ’em.”’ It must have been quite a rumpus, for Charlie was laughing uncontrollably at the memory. ““T'd ’ave thought yer’d ’ave been chucked out neck and crop after that little do,’’ says Slim. “Not a bit of it. Lizzie swore she wouldn’t stay in the ’ouse with it, would pack ’er bags, and clear off, and the wife called ’er- bluff. It turned out the Missus was as fed up wi’ ’er as I was meself. So off Liz went the very next day and took ’er crummy cat with ’er. I tell yer, it were a smashing day’s work, that.”’ “Well, blow me down!” says Slim. ‘“ If I’d a’ known that, I’d ’ave asked ten quid for the monk.” ‘“ Aye,” said Charlie, still grinning broadly. ‘And if I’d known, I’d ’ave given it yer.”’ * * * MIXED BAG Are you game to take a shot at the following questions, which cover a wide range of subjects? Crack shooting will bag you sixteen points. Please turn to page 66 to find out your score. 1. What Hunt was up in 1953? (1) 2. Does the expression “ with the skin of my teeth” occur first mn: a. Shakespeare 6.the Bible cc. Bunyan (1) 3. How many legs has: a. a laughing jackass 6. a Bombay duck c.a Penang lawyer (3) 4. What did Phiz do for Boz? = (2) 5. Can you complete the following quotations: a. The devil can—Scripture for his purpose b. Tomorrow to fresh—, and pastures new c. I'll make assurance—sure d. —on, Macduff (4) 6. What ts the length of an ordinary cigarette? (1) 7. What is the difference in meaning between the uses of the following in Great Britain and the U.S.A.: a. hundredweight b. billion c. suspenders d.F.BJI. (4) comiclooks.comn Lae ? ? 4 -