A. Merritt's Fantasy Magazine, April 1950 — page 42: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

42 A. MERRITT’S FANTASY covenant I had made, and claiming this night of my desire that I should render myself to her, who had given me length of days and knowledge beyond human compass. I would have pleaded, but she bound me in a black forgetfulness deep as death itself, to release me at the beginning of the new day. Then, wakening, I saw my lover dead at my feet, knew from his wounds she had claimed him as a sacrifice while I lay as dead, and thus had gained renewal of her strength. The lion-headed had torn him, drained his blood, and then had left him. In that day, fleeing lest I should be accused of his death, I first cursed her, though by the knowledge the ages had given me I knew the covenant was now sealed by a life, and I knew, beyond a doubt, I might not break it. (“The first of nine lives,” Gees thought but did not say.) I fled to the city Alexander founded at the seaward end of the delta, and there, though I was out of time and beyond its power, time gave me peace. I had many great jewels, gifts and bribes for my wis- dom while I served at Abydos—the twin pearls of which Cleopatra drank one be- fore Antony, were once in my possession. She was last and most evil of the evil race of the Lagidae, and I knew the city in the days of her fall, when Octavian, man of ice that he was, rounded off his con- ‘quest of the world. One night I walked alone, and a drunken Laestrygon of Cimmeria took me up and carried me off, desiring me against my will, and I thought then that the goddess no longer had power, and that the covenant was ended. But before he could harm me I felt the darkness and heard the voice claiming that I render myself up a second time, and again I knew a blackness like death, to waken and find the Laestrygon dead—as the man of my desire had died. Then I who had cursed the goddess blessed her, remembering her words of the covenant when she said she would be a shield between me and all harm. This was the second time, the second life, and ‘out of that death she gave me new life as she gained it for herself, a renewed youth . : —because I blessed her, it may have been. i eee EK or the goddess bade me go to Epheses, and there I saw the great temple to Artemis and knew they wor- shiped Isis in different guise, as they worshiped Hathor when they made sacri- fice to Aphrodite, who again laid hold on me, there in Ephesus. A man strong and gentle, whom I willed to love me as I loved him. For six weeks—six little weeks !—he was mine and I his, and then she laid the darkness on me and took him, killed him as a lioness kills. I looked on him torn and bloodless and cursed the covenant, knowing her all evil now, who once had been mother to her servants. This was the third time of my rendering up, the third life. In a little while, a new life stirred with- in me—it was given to me, timeless, to bear a child who must be bound by time. I thought what it would be to see the child of my loving grow old and go down to death, I remaining changeless and young, since by the covenant six lives re- mained to be taken. Yet even so at the first faint cry of the born child I knew life completed and perfect. But this too she took, laying the darkness on me while she slew it, a babe not yet come to speech, and I was alone. In the madness of that grief I told my- self that I had known all of life, and would make an end, since for her own purpose the goddess could so torture me, though she had said she would be a shield between me and all harm. In that day your Lord taught in Galilee, but no word of His teaching had reached my ears. I took my jewels, and poison that I bought, and with them went to a cave that I knew beyond the walls of Ephesus. I had a hope that by the poison I might travel to join the man I had loved, and the babe to whom I had given life. So, having taken the poison, I slept— for an hour, I would have said, to wake naked and see shepherds in the cave, amazed at what they saw. Being simple men, and kind, they gave me clothing, the rough clothes of a shepherd boy, and I put them on and came out from the cave, not forgetting the jewels that fate had paged me keep by me even when I sought eath T came out to a new world, for while I slept, Rome had been ravished, harle-— <S- EO Gomicboo