Life — September 21, 1928 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Our Foolis “When you left home this morning I'll bet you little thought that before the day was out you'd be perched here with a man you'd never seen before!" “What do you take me for, boy? Do you think Vcame here to play trains?” —Loxvos Cattine. ALL OFT AND NO DISTANCE Two members of the firm were discussing the case of a young man who, taken on through influence and boosted as a boy wonder, had fiz- zled miserably. “The trouble with him,"* said one of them, ‘‘was that they teed him up too high."—New York Sun. HIS WEAKNESS NOW “Arey says Eloise is different from other girls." “Yes, she likes him."* —Louisville Courier-Journal. Teacutr: What are people called who are al- ways tying to point out other people's defects? Wittit: Teachers.—Karikaturen (Oslo). errs = THE TIBER INN, BES S| Arraste Passexcer: I think I'll stop here for some refreshment. Er—what will you take—a bottle of beer or a bundle of hay? —Hustonisr (Loxpow). THE FOLLOW THROUGH Tue crimsox sun was sinking low As on the golf course stood the dub. He couldn't hit the ball, but, oh, How far that man could throw a club! —Golfing. CREATIVE ART Tuart old one about the tot who tried to draw papa but put a wil on it and let it go as a dog must have been a true story. We were called into the nursery this morning to sce Doris's latest art world supplement. “This was supposed to be a picture of you,’ she informed us, nibbling her crayon critically. “But I guess you'll think it is two black mice." —Chicago Evening Post. “Aut Scissors aut Nullus” A PROBLEM OF THE TALKIES THE TALKING movies are going to get a severe strain when the movie buder in the English society fillum is called on to announce the Honourable and Mrs. St. John Cholmondely- Marjoribanks.—Arkansas Gazette. “DEAR MISS FAIRFAX—"* One of the everlasting paradoxes is the letter to the Advice to the Lovelorn editor which avers, “Lam eighteen and considered very pretty," and is signed ‘Lonely Heart.""—Detroit News. Hoste is where the laundry comes. —Louisville Times. “C-e-could 1 have an appointment with the d-d-dentist today?” “No hope.’* “Oh, thank you so much.” —Burtenin (Syover). mntemporaries “Your friend Phil told me he knew of nothieg smaller than my fect.’ “1 do—the shoes they're in.” —L'Isreansictasr (Panu), HONEST TOM Tost Husxty, we understand, is secretly plannizg to go in a play. It will be about himself. A po ducer asked about Tom's ability as an acu. “Well,"’ answered a Broadwayite, “you a: judge for yourself. Tom is going to play te part of ‘Kid’ Martin—they're getting somebxty else to play Heen —New York Evening Journal. “Suttan Gives U. S. Sailor a Harem."—Iten Tink of the expense of distributing ladies free port to port!—Milwaukee Sentinel. You think you would buy better stuff this the magazine editors do, but so would they é they had a chance.—Columbia (S. C.) State. The Bartender Rocks the Baby to Sleep. —Snvacsnisse-Sreix comicbooks.com