Life — August 30, 1928 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PE Th Bunikless Candidate Exposes the Bunk “The Republicans Don’t Want Hoover, and the Democrats Don’t Want Smith”’ Att you hear now is the Politicians of both partys, and all the editorial writers on party newspapers, bragging and holler- ing about what great Candidates they have, and how the Thinking Element in both partys is so Satisfied and Delighted with their new Leaders. You get the idea from listening to em that Al Smith is really Thomas Jefferson disguised in a brown derby. And Hoover is Abraham Lincoln with acollege education. Both of them Carry On The Glorious Traditions Of Our Party because they're in favor of Motherhood, Virtue, the Con- stitution and anything else that seems to all for a word of praise, including the Farmer. All the Politicians have given it out that Herb and Al is practically their Ideal. Well that’s the Eiggest Bunk of the whole thing. As a matter of fact both Candidates were shoved down the Politicians’ throats, And it was painful swallowing. Now take Hoover, You know as well as anything that the Politicians dident want Hoover. The only clement that wanted Hoover youre ju “aw no, taint? Candidate Refuses to Admit That Sex Appeal Is an Issue by WILL ROGERS was the the people, not the Politicians. They had to take Hoover because they saw that he was the one with the most strength. If they could have found anybody else in the party that had a prayer to get any votes outside his own Hock, they would have ditched Hoover and had a good laugh while doing it. Same way with the Democrats and Al Smith, If they could only have found some real high-class man that was a Dry, and a Protestant, and who also would have been able to get a few votes here and there, they'd have nominated him quicker than you can say Joe Robinson. I claim both these Candidates were nominated not because they were the Ideal Choices but because they had vote-getting qualifications that was not possessed by any one else in their partys. They are both able fine men, but they wasent chosen on that account. I heard the Republicans say a lot about Hoover (before he was nominated) that they wouldent like to have repeated now. And a lot of prominent Democrats have cer- tainly changed their opinions about Al Smith since they found it was Smith or nothing. To get right down to brass tacks, Both Hoover and Smith had the poorest op- ition that ever faced any Candidates in the history of nominations. They just won because there was just nobody else in the race on either side that could give a sure guarantee that they could carry their own precinct, much less their State. You know the Republican Farmers don’t want Hoover, But they will vote for him because he will come nearer keeping their side in than anyone else. Anyone that is not kidding themselves knows that the South is not crazy about ple, and he was put over by} Smith, But they will vote for him, the same as the Farmers in Iowa will vote for Hoover. Nothing Smith stands for is in line with the things the South stands for, But he stands the best chance of election, And that is the main thing to stand for. He is not their Ideal of a President, But he is more their Ideal of a President than any Republican that ever lived. So the old Gag you're hearing now that both men were put where they are by practically unanimous indorsement and approval of the whole party is the Bunk. here is thousands of Republicans that will admit to you they “don’t know what kind of a President Hoover would make,” and there is thousands of Democrats that admit they “don’t know what kind of a President Smith would make.” Half of each Party is not crazy about their Candidate. One is a Dry, but would not refuse Wet votes, The other is a Wet, with a Dry vote complex. So the Wets in Pennsylvania will vote for Dry Hoover, because he’s a Republi- can, and the Drys in Texas will vote for Wet Smith, because he’s a Democrat. Although the problem of the Farmer in Our Candidate Also Rejects Contributions of Money and Chewing Gum comicbooks.com