Life — August 23, 1928 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Tue Runaways “Gee, it’s getting dark. Maybe we'd better go back for our tooth-brushes.” tivate spontaneity—that priceless stock in trade which Theodore Roosevelt had but which Woodrow Wilson could never de- velop. He should carefully avoid over-use of the convenient word ‘“‘constructive,” which, if used without specifications, is as much jargon in politics as it is in business. Henry Suydam. The Man I Love “Wuy, hello, Ed! Howsa boy? Gee, I'm glad to see you. Where you been all these years? Why dontcha ever give a fellow a zz an’ let him hear from you? Lemme look you over. Say, Ed, you're gettin’ old! You old sonar: Jon Fe gettin’ bald!! (Hearty laughter.) TI kick. To think o° you gettin’ bald. You're gettin’ fat, too. Just a coupla years more, big boy, an’ you'll have to carry that bay window o° yours around in a wheel- barrow. (Hearty laughter.) How's the missus? How’s the kids? That boy o’ yours must be shavin’ by now. Let's see— you been married twelve years now, or is ithirtecn? I'll say time flies, don’t it, Ed? It won't be long now before they have us old guys in the wheel chairs, Ain’t it the truth, Ed? Let's see. I'm thirty-eight an’ you must be four or five years older’n me. Bui, thank Pete, I ain't got any bald spot yet. As long as a man keeps a good head o’ hair, he don’t begin to show his ae always say. Why dontcha rub some olive oil and turpentine into your hair every night? That'll start the old grass growin’. And you oughta begin comin’ up at's rich! That's a} to the club and playin’ handball. You'd feel a lot better if you'd get rid of a coupla tons o’ that blubber you're packia’ around. (Hearty laughter.) Well, old timer, I’m glad I ran into you. Let’s get together one o’ these days an’ tie some knots in the car tracks or somethin.’ If any o’ your kids get married, invite me to the weddin’. (Hearty laughter.) So long, Ed. Don't take no Canadian labels.”” Robert Lord. Wituram Actes Wurre evidently doesn’t believe that love conquers Al. “Hey, there isn’t room for both of us here!” The Whole System’s Wrong “Recisterep for the election yet?” “No, I haven't found time, Bill. It’s an awful lot of bother, Bill, having to chase down to the City Hall every two years.” “Yeah. It is a kind of nuisance.” “The whole system's wrong, Bill. You have to go down and stand in line for five minutes to register, and then on Election Day you line up again at the polls. It’s too much trouble, Bill.”” “Yeah. They seem to make it as hard for the voters as they can.” “A fella simply can’t find time for it all, Bill. Usually you're too rushed to vote before work, and in the afternoon you're too tired to hunt up a voting place.” “Yeah, That's right. Well, Charley: what about the morning?” “TH set the alarm for three, Bill, and as soon as I get up I'll phone you. We'll chase right out to the course and sign up. If we stay right there we ought to be able to tee off in three or four hours.” “Sure we had. And if we have to wait until eleven or twelve, we can get in cigh- | teen holes before dark.” now, Chet Johnson. ALL IN THE DAY’S WORK First Monx (at Hospice of St. Ber- nard): Brother, one of the dogs just | brought in an exhausted wayfarer, who would have perished among the icy Alps. Stconp Monk: Ho, hum—the same old story! Now if a man should rescue a dog, that would be news. comicbooks.com