Life — August 16, 1928 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Before Shaving HINDS CREAM The secret Of a smooth shave Is a soft beard. But who will take Three minutes To rub in lather? Men don’t. They just rub Hinds Cream On their faces Before lathering up. And cut their Shaving time In half. Try it. Here’s the way:— Before you lather, rub in Hinds Cream vigor- ously for two or three seconds. You'll be sur- prised how it softens the beard! Then lather right over the Hinds Cream while it is still wet. Boy! what a clean, smooth, easy shave! After shaving, rub in a little more Hinds Cream until your fin- gers cling. Your skin will feel soft and re- laxed all day. After Shaving HINDS CREAM > en LEHN & FIN! Sole Distributors Dept. 1448 Bloombeld, N. J, Please send me a sample bortle of Hinds Honey and Almond Cream, so I can enjoy a smooth shave for once. 7 CThia coupon not good after August, 1929) Shave your face but fave your skin LIFeE Ballade of an Alarming Epidemic Now every one with idle cash In these so-called United States Is busily collecting trash From earlier—though doubtful—dates; Now luster bowls and pewter plates Entice the proletarian— And I have added to my hates The nouveau-antiquarian. Now Smith and Smithers boldly crash The arty connoisseur debates, And Burks and Berkowitzes clash On Stiegel’s esoteric traits. Antique collecting animates Both aesthete and vulgarian, While on my nervous system grates The nouveau-antiquarian. Then devil take the bits of sash Once worn by Washington at fétes! And cursed be the calabash Once smoked by Bet-a-Million Gates! Were I the pow’r that legislates I'd issue rights riparian To drown these pests crates): The nouveau-antiquarian. (in leaden L’Envot Prince, though of ancient junk orates Each hopeful millenarian, He knows oblivion awaits The nouveau-antiquarian. N. D. Plume. In the Tree Surgery “Wuat’s Miss Willow weeping about?” She's afraid she may have to lose a “My dear! I had three lower limbs taken off, and a cavity filled with cement, and the surgeon said—” “He told me he'd never seen a tree with such a high =p Otcsvure as I—oh, there’s Miss Beech. How does she keep her bark so smooth? Mine peels dread- fully in this hot weather.” “Sh! Don’t look ‘round. It’s Mrs. Chestnut; she'll spring that old story about her leaves falling out. By the way, what do you use on your leaves?” “The surgeon has a new spray, simply wonderful for thick glossy leaves! Even Mrs. Oak—” “It’s a hundred and sixty years since she was an acorn! Oh, here’s the surgeon!” “He’s coming this way. I feel as if 1 were rooted to the spot! T do hope he won't decide to operate.” Thomas Pye. Movie Director: When we've run this car over the cliff, call up the junkman and have him haul it away. Property Man: Aw, let me have it. I've got a nephew that’s going away to college in September. After the G cn hi ys b or ot I th we iss Maghty refreshing with cracked ict, or ginger ale or sparkling water . hi OOL yourself off while you talk z itover, with a glass of Welch's D Grape Juice. hu There’s nothing more truly re $0 freshing. Because Welch’s is the pure juice of fresh fruit it supplies energy value, fruit nourishment and mineral salts your body needs. And the flavor is delightful, whether you drink Welch’s straight, blended or diluted. If you want a long cool drink mit Welch’s with ginger ale or sparkling water, or make a pitcher of Welch Punch. Recipes are on every label At soda fountains ask for straight Welch’s or a Welch-ade. Free—How tu make Fruit Drinks. Mal a postcard to The Welch Grape Juice Co., L-91, Westfield, N. Y. In Canada, St. Catharines, Ont. ; WELCH’S Once you've tasted Welch’s no other grape juice will d comicbooks.com