Life, 1928-02-23 · page 13 of 35
Life — February 23, 1928 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct pieces: 1. **"The Last Word"** (poem by Finlay M. McDermid): A satirical complaint about tedious humor writing—specifically mocking humorists who write lengthy, repetitive pieces about irritating people (giggling girls, clamoring youth). The author declares he's tired of such writing and threatens legal action against anyone continuing the trend. 2. **King Arthur cartoon**: A medieval scene where Lancelot negotiates the price of armor with King Arthur, quoting "two cents an ounce" mail costs—an anachronistic joke mixing medieval chivalry with modern postal rates. 3. **"Journalistic Portraits"** (by Herbert Hoover): Brief character sketches of notable figures, including references to engineers, Californians, travelers, and Mussolini (described as accepting a "portrait of himself measuring twenty-six square yards").
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
The Last Word ie 'M growing rather weary now, As years go by, of people who We ould slay the guy who'd say to them, “Don't do a thing I wouldn't do.” I'm getting rather tired of The lengthy skits in prose Of humorists who write about The folks they’d hammer on the nose. verse or It's not that I love every one; There are some people who an- noy— The girl who giggles, cute?” The youth who clamors, the boy?” “Ain't he “How's It’s not that I object at all To quiet boobicide; don’t doubt it, It isn't that; it’s just, I wish They wouldn't write so about it. much In short, my patience now is gone. Yes, if I ever find the bore Who writes the next such skit I see I'll strew the landscape with his gore. I'll plead “Defense,” and when I’m asked, “Just how did the deceased afflict d then the Judge will cry, ee; no jury will convict Finlay M. McDermid. it a man makes a better mouse-trap than his neighbor, his neighbor will borrow it. Kinc Artnur: How much'll you take for this suit of armor, Lance? LanceLot: Two cents an ounce, King; it’s first-class mail. Journalistic Portraits Hersert Hoover H E is such a capable engincer that he probably could park his car with his wife’s people in the back seat without marring a fender. He understands finance; not so well as Andrew Mellon, of course, — Kitcuen Sink 1n 1975 but it is said he once explained a household budget system issued by a savings bank. He knows how to be a Californian without rubbing it in. He has traveled widely, probably any man outside of the Notre Dame as much as Knute Rockne, coach. He has been in the public eye for fourteen years and nobody has ever thought of calling him “Herb.” McCready Huston. Reduced MUSSOLINI has accepted a por- trait of himself measuring twenty-six square yards. A minia- ture, obviously, done by the same chap who spends his spare time en- graving the Lord's Prayer on the head of a pin. comicbooks.com