Life — June 9, 1927 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Life —And I'll Tell You Another id the location man of the Outdoor Adver- rvice to the advertising manager of the Dandelion Milk Like Wine Co., “I've found a place for 1 billboard that can be gotten for a song. You know the road that leads out of Blimpdale into the moun- tains? Well, I got an option on the first left turn after you leave that pumping station two miles from the crossroads, You know where I mean?” “Yes,” said the advertising manager; ‘‘ but we're not inter- ested in that lo- cation.” “Not inte r- ested? Then you're crazy! Why, do you Mama: GLApioLa! wHere ARE you — know that 30,000 Gor automobiles with Pup: \'vk GOT A BONE TO PICK WITIL an average ton- THAT KITTEN THAT scRATCHED ME nage of 5,000 +ROM HER VISITING List! pounds and a mean carrying capacity of four persons pass that spot during the months of June, July and August alone? Do you know that every one of those people is a potential prospect for Dandelion Milk?” “Yes, [ know all that, but we're not interested !” “Do you know I can get that spot, erect the sign and keep it in perfect repair for you for less than fifteen dol- lsxrs a month, which is a milline rate of some- thing like three-sixteenths of a cent per fiscal annum ? “No, I didn’t know that, but we're not inter- ested.” “Do you know that the Orchid Con- densed Milk Corporation will snap up that spot if you don’t take it? Do you know what competition on that particular spot alone for a period of six months will cost your company?” “Yes. I know perfectly. But I also know what the view is to the north from that spot. Let the Orchid crowd ruin it if they like. But the directors of my company would never consent to having one of our billboards spoil such a perfect vista. Good d Carroll Carroll. Newly Acquired APPLICANT (for position as 1M naid): My vame is Gwen- dolin Argincourt, madam. Lavy: How do you spell it? Aveticant: T haven't tried to spell it yet, madam — I've only had it two days. “WHEREJA GET THE BUMP?” “NiguT cLuB.” “WHERE WAS TIE NIGHT CLUB?” “aN Tur cop’s MAND.” Sorrows of a Popular Man ORACE FROBISHER, JR., of Broken Bow, Neb., hurried from the post office to the nearest drug store and called nérvously for a double coke. His hand trembled, letting a page of the letter he had just opened drift to the floor unheeded. “Whassa matter, Horace? You look all in,” the soda clerk asked sympathetically, pushing the drink across the bar, “Oh, it’s these New York clubs of mine,” Horace exclaimed. “They seem to think I can give my attention to all of them! When the Book-of-the-Month Club asked me to come in with the original group of selected mem- bers, I was glad. to let them use my name. I didn’t have much on hand just then but National Geographic; hadn't had since I dropped out of the Roycrofters. ‘Then along came the First Edition Society wanting me for mber. Realizing that my po- n carries a certain responsibil- y, I went into that. And now I've been elected to the Literary Guild! “TM just have to write and tell the secretary t on account of my duties as representative of the Drama League, I cannot possibly accept. If I don't look out I'll fall behind with my work the Mentor Association.” McCready Huston. Fancy Costumes “WZOU say the cen- sors have closed : theatre? He always dresses his usherettes up to fit the film and the ex- change sent him a pro- duction called ‘The Garden of Eden,’" “wry! GET THA MRLL out FROM UNDER THERE—WHERE WOULD YA BE IF THIS THING SHOULD FALL?” comicbooks.com