Life — May 12, 1927 — page 41: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Punctilious Punctuality He was a very dignified old colored gentleman of the “befo’ de war” type. He came into one of the small branches of the Public Library on February 3, 1924, and took out a borrower's card. He spent a long time browsing around among the books on religion and finally went with great pleasure with a copy of Margaret Sangster’s “Women of the Bible” and a cook book. Time went on and he did not come back. ‘The books became overdue, very much overdue, and finally were give up as hopelessly lost. Early on the morning of February 3, 1927, he appeared in front of the desk —a little older, a little more polite, as became the recipient of a courtesy, a little tired. “Hyah's yo" books, Ma’am, an’ Ah thank ye dly. Ah finished with ’em some time ago, an’ Ah moved oveh to Jersey; but Ah been keepin’ ’em careful an’ mindin’ the date so as to get ‘em back in time. Ah didn’t want to keep yo’ waitin’.” “*Oh, yes, yes,” replied the librarian with a gasp, and then dropped her eyes to the spot on the card where the worn black finger was resting. The card, issued for three years’ use, read: “Expires February 3, 1927.” New York Sun. Fon the simile championship we enter “As self-effacing as a treasury surplus under the eye of Andrew Melion.” —Chicago Daily News. B. C’s’’ of Foot Comfort Shake Allen's Foot-Ease into your shoes each morning and walk all day in com- fort. You feel fresher and tire less easily. Take this lesson to heart—all you who are active and on your feet every day— who enjoy dancing, walking and sports. Allen's Foot-Ease, the Antiseptic, Healing powder for the feet, takes the friction rom the shoes, soothes tender, tired, aching, smarting feet, absorbs perspira- tion, relieves calluses, corns and bunions, and saves ALLEN’S FOOT=EASE who feels to life's better Junior Answers the Telephone Junior (in a shrill treble): Hello. Mas. Sairit (sweetly): Is your mother in this afternoon, dear? J. What did you sa Mrs. S. (not so sireetly): Is your mother in, Junior? Je: Huh? Mas. S. (sourly): Is your mother in? J. Ob, yes, mother’s here. : Will you please call her? Mas. S.: Will you call her? J. Huh? Mas. S.: Will you call your mother!!! J.: Oh, yes, I'll call her. (And the receiver clicks in Mrs. Smith's ear as Junior hangs it up before he goes to find his mother.) —Country Gentleman. Evetyn: Is Betty left-handed? Dons: No, engaged. —Boston Transcript. The Modern Child “How old are you?” inquired the visi- tor of his host's little son. “That is a difficult question,” answered the young man, removing his spectacles and wiping them reflectively. “The latest personal survey available shows my psy- chological age to be 12, my moral age 4, my anatomical age 7, and my physiolog- ical age 6. I suppose, however, that you refer to my chronological age, which is 8 That is so old-fashioned that I sel- dom think of it any more.” —Success Magazine. Add Hotel Notices Siox behind the clerk’s desk in the Hotel Albert, Selma: “Ir You'ne So Damn Smart Wuy Aty’t You Ricu?” —Cleveland Plain Dealer. Massacuusetts, Thayer she stands for! —New York World, comicbooks.com