Life, 1927-03-24 · page 16 of 38
Life — March 24, 1927 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several satirical pieces targeting early 20th-century social conventions: **"Attention, Chicago Police!"** is a darkly humorous confessional supposedly from a prisoner seeking forgiveness. The joke appears to be that the "crimes" listed are absurdly trivial (stealing a wife, sweetheart, etc.) mixed with actual weapons, mocking how people rationalize serious wrongs. **The automobile cartoon** depicts a young woman and man in a car with specific comic dialogue about the ride's conditions—she sets strict rules (no smoking, drinking, or late returns), while he misunderstands, thinking she meant something else. The joke relies on flirtation and misunderstanding about the automobile as a dating space. **The tobacco advertisement** humorously "proposes marriage" using exaggerated claims about a product's virtues, satirizing advertising's overwrought promises.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Recruit Ball Player: WHAT DAY DOES THE SEASON 0 f Veteran Ball Player: 1 THINK IT's THE TWELFTH OF APRIL, BUT I WOULDN'T GAM- BLE ON IT. Attention, Chicago Police! Form $65x5 4a. (Prisoners will please check correct answers and fill in names.) I (prisoner’s name) hereby confess that I killed (name of corpse).. with a (paper cutter), (letter opener), (razor), (revolver), (rifle), (shot- gun), (machine gun), (Big Bertha), (strychnine), (carbolic acid), (wood alcohol) on (give date) because (he), (she), stole my (wife), (sweetheart), (husband), (lover), (whisky shipment), (beer consignment), (virtue). I further state that I killed him (in self-defense) (after he had reached for his gun), (like a dog, and I'm glad I did it). Everything got (red) (black), I (pulled my own pistol) (wrested his pistol away from him), and I remember (that I pointed it at him and pulled the trig- ger) (nothing more). (Note to Appricant: Newspa- pers have requested that you fill in the following. Thank you, sir.) I left my mother’s knee when I was years old. She is now a ‘ «haired old woman with...... cheeks, but she knows her (boy) (girl) could do no wrong. I have asked the father of the slain (man) (woman) for forgiveness and he is (praying for my soul) (looking for me with a shotgun). Signed sovsvexsueccusseverees Temporary Guest of the City of Chicago. Curtis Mitchell. Haute Nouveauté SING fal-dal-de-ral In a dithyramb droll, There's nobody flying or walking or running or s: ailing or ski-ing or motoring To the well-known North Pole. J. F. B., Jr. A Tobacco Advertising Writer Proposes Marriage “T ’M telling you, girl, for a double- riveted, copper-cornered fact that you can never know what real matrimony is until you have married me. Maybe I'm prejudi even so, the statement stands. Give the glad sign, and—oh, girl!— you'll probably say I wasn’t enthusi- astic enough. I'll be faithful as the tax collector. Generous as a man with an unlimited expense account. Considerate of your comfort as a tourist agent. Ardent as noon in Sahara. Ambitious as Mussolini, Irresistible as a traffic cop. Kind as a mother cat. Disposition sweet and mild; every bit of bite and jealousy removed by a patented process. ‘Take me! Step into it and get on the sunny side of happiness. No matter what your previous experience with love and lovers has been, check-in with me and I will be a revelation!” A.W. Fair One: Now, BEFORE WE START FOR THIS RIDE, 1 WANT TO TELL YOU THAT 1 DON’T SMOKE, DRINK OR PET; I VISIT NO ROADHOUSES, AND I EXPECT TO BE HOME BY TEN O’cLOCK. Young Gallant: you’RE MISTAKEN. “you MEAN THAT 1 DO ANY OF THOSE THIN “NO; 1 MEAN ABOUT STARTING FOR THIS RIDE.” comicbooks.com tu ha + SS 2