Life, 1926-12-09 · page 9 of 45
Life — December 9, 1926 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three satirical sketches with comedic dialogue: **"By Urgent Request"** depicts a recording session where a sergeant requests a soldier sing for a phonograph record. The soldier's terrible vocal performance (described as "Terrible!" and "Worse!") is the joke—he's hilariously bad, yet persists in trying. **"Last Resort"** shows a couple (Mayme and Sadie) discussing portable radios and tuning into "The Star-Spangled Banner." **"Escape"** features a domestic scene where a man uses a fabricated story about a tough, cold winter and needing a janitor as an excuse to leave home—poking fun at marital escape tactics. **"The Truth About Christmas"** is an advice column addressing holiday gift-giving and family spending customs. The overall tone is light domestic humor typical of 1920s American satire.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
By Urgent Request “In addition to measurements and fin- gerprints, criminals are now being sub- jected toh ig phonograph records of their voices made.”"—News item. xe I: The recording room at Headquarters. ERGEANT: O. K., Gyp. ot your prints; now we want to make a little record of your voice. Gye McCreany (a desperate crook, suddenly coy): Ah, I ain't got n’ I gotta cold. : Never mind that. Polic THI T We me mewsic Tur Sere Give us a sel Gyre (clearing his throat): “I drem tatta dwell tinna ma-h. z..." How's at? ant: Terrible! Well, how about somepin’ jazzy? (He tries again.) “Swe-e-c- Taddo-L.1 5 Tur > Ant: Woise! A Cov: You ought to get twenty years for that sure. Gyp: I getcha—ya tryin’ ta frame me! Nothin’ doin’! (4 terrific bat tle ensues, Gye fighting with the outrayed dignity of a true artist. He lays out the sergeant and attendant cops and goes out the window.) Curtain The same room—later. We'll all: get Scene IT: A Cov (awearily): Flatbush for this. Tih SerGeant: way as ever [ see. As cles Who'd geta- thank (The door opens and Gyr Me- Creapy, desperate crook, enters.) Att tir Cops: What th’ ep (smiling pleasantly): all right, boys. I knew IT couldn't do meself justice Without no accom- paniment, sol went home and got me ukulele. Let'er , perfessor.... (Thus time tie CURTAIN stays bow.) H.W. Hanemann. Escape RUE: Going outh for the winter? Sve: Yes, they say we're going to hav e a tough, cold Janitor. It's “AND HOW AM I LOOKID “SPLENDID, BESS, YOU DON'T LOOK A DAY O WAY, HOW OLD are you?” Last Resort M** ME (on crowded trolley car): Wotcha got in that pack- age, Sadie? Sapte: One 0 radios, Mayme: Chee! If yuh can tune in “The Star Spangled Banner” meb- be we can git a seat. them portable The Truth About Christmas OW soon after Christmas do you give the baby the greeting cards to play with? What rule do you follow about gifts for cousins? Cousins-in-law? What part of your Christmas ex- pense did your Christmas savings fund cover? Did any rela- tive ever surprise you by a really generous gift? How long were you laid up? Do you ever read Christmas editorials in the newspapers? What do you think should be done about them? McC. H. RS. A.: Is “JUST GIVE ME A RECEIPT FOR THAT MONEY TO SHOW MY WIFE, WILL you?” “SURE, BUD—IS ONF ENOUGH? your husband a good loser? Mrs. B.: No. A permanent one! comicbooks.com