Life — December 2, 1926 — page 33: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

he New Cathode eCMistletoe “Ray ITH the advance of science, Wei year sees some im- provement in one or an- other of the various traditional Yuletide practices that have become so dear to every one, be he Repub- lican or Democrat, black or white, raspberry or vanilla. ‘ Last year it was electric plum pudding. It was Magnus Spoffard, a brilliant young worker in the Gen- eral Electric Laboratories, who con- ceived the idea of illuminating plum puddi by lighting them elec- trically instead of by pouring burn- ing brandy over them. Spoffard led a conduit from the cellar up under the table through the pudding to a forty-watt bulb hidden in the sprig of holly on the top of the pudding. This released a supply of brandy estimated at some 450,000 gallons, which was used to illuminate guests instead of puddings. This year it is expected that over a million gal- lons of brandy will not be burned on plum puddings on the Eastern sea- board alone. Science’s 1926 gift is the new cathode ray, which promises to revolutionize the traditional sport of kissing under the mistletoe. The new cathode mistletoe is the invention of that remarkable young woman, Hester Tither- adge, who, despite her sex (female) and her age (thirty- three), is already conceded by Wall Street to be America’s leading mistletoe magnate. Ten years ago Hester Titheradge was up against it. Her husband had disap- peared, leaving her with two children and three other hus- bands to support. It was Snowing and Christmas was coming. In those days they Science's Yuletide Gift to Man By Prank Sullivan. had Christmas once every year. It looked as if there wouldn’t be any Santa Claus for the Titheradges that year. It looked as if there wouldn't even be a Daddy Browning. Then an idea came to Hester. “The very idea!” she exclaimed. Fifteen minutes later she was walk- ing down Fifth Avenue through the gently falling snow, holding a tam- bourine in one hand and in the other a section of fishing pole from the top of which a sprig of mistletoe dangled at a point just over Hes- ter’s lovely blonde head; for she was indeed lovely and blonde, and even then gentlemen preferred her. “Give anything you like. No change back,” laughed Hester, as gentlemen by the score stopped and merrily took advantage of the time- honored custom of kissing the fair sex under the mistletoe. She went home with $77 and a lead slug that some one had slipped over on her. But the Titheradges had their Christmas. Next year she made her plans early. A well-placed advertisement brought her a hundred comely lasses. Around each of them Hester had a light scaffolding erected by the neighborhood carpenter at a trifling cost. From the summit of the scaffolding dangled the _ telltale mistletoe. The girls carried, not paltry tambourines, but two large milk pails each, and on the scaffold- ing was a sign which read: “Kissing Under the Mistletoe. One Dollar Each. Boys Under Sixteen Not Allowed Without Guardian.” The girls got thirty per cent. of the gross, The mistletoe constituted the only overhead, which was neg- ligible. Hester Titheradge cleared $75,000 that Christmas, The business grew. To- day, in every town or city of any size, Christmas is not counted complete unless the community has its quota of Titheradge Girls. Hester has systematized things. The original, rather cumbersome scaffolding has been dis- carded. To-day a flunky walks behind each girl, hold- ing a chandelier over her, and the mistletoe dangles * from the chandelier. It makes it so much more (Continued on page 56) comicbooks.com