Life — November 11, 1926 — page 39: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Western Stuff HIS Alkali Al and his fearless pal— New Mexico Pete, by name— Are riders as bold as the stories told Of a West that is far from tame. You may picture the two as a reck- less crew Out yonder where men are strong; As a dauntless pair that.all dangers dare, And you won't be greatly wrong. You may fancy the twain on a rolling plain Each wearing his chaps and gat, All booted and spurred, but, upon my word, are never a bit like that. On their pinto steeds, where the tumbleweeds Blow over the prairics wide, You may think they dash, but, al- though they’re rash, That isn’t the way they ride. They are riders bold as the knights of old (As an earlier stanza blabs), But their riding’s done and their wages won In Los Angeles taxicabs. Walt W. Mills. Round About Town Who's Zoo: Bronx Park THE old lady with the incredibly large purple flower hat who deems it a crime that the poor an- imals should be cooped up like this, and who brings (by way of atone- ment for the perpetration) at least ten bags of peanuts to throw to zebra and polar bear alike—in magnificent defiance of .the prominently dis- played prohibition....The — fellow with the simian profile who never saw anything so hideous as these here orang-outangs....“Oo, Ma, wot's ‘at?” “That's a—lemme see— oh, it’s a baby hippopotamus, dar- ling. Isn't it cute?” “But, Momma, it doesn’t look like a baby!"...The wise-cracking flapper who joshes (for her boy-friend’s benefit) the cage of parrots and gets nothing for her pains beyond a murderous shriek ” and a devastating series of cackles....The tigress who means to have her nap, audience or no audience, and snores unperturbed through nerve-shattering hoots and Summonings....“‘Not another piece of Crackerjack for you, young man! You've had enough for three. You're getting a physic the minute we get home. Now go inside with Daddy and see the nice snakes, while Mother rests her feet a little.”... Don’t you think ? It is by no means strange that men who want “something better” in cigarettes turn to Fatima. All things considered: tobaccos, aroma, subtle delicacy, it would be extraordinary if they didn’t What a whale of a difference just a few cents make Liccrrt & Myers Tosacco Co. The voluble, countless Italian far ily, lunch and all, who have come out to make a day of it and who need no encouragement at all to try out every available resting spot through the length and width of the zodlogical gardens....The woman who has managed to sneak in a kodak but cannot for the life of her persuade the leopard to stand still long enough to be snapped....“My God, kinya ‘magine wot would hap- pen if one o’ them lions ever got loose?” ‘“‘Fa Pete’s sakes, waddya hafta think 0’ such things for? Ya come here t’ enjoy yaself, dincha?”... Simonetta. Club Gossip “TI MET a new bootlegger to-day.” “Really! Did he find your ref- erences satisfactory Cortez Ac ERHAPS the services of the Missing Persons Bureau could be employed to trace the whereabouts, if any, of the Kings of Rumania and Italy. FOR THAT COUGH! ECHARM OF YOUTH lingers in a clean skin. Experts ad- vise soap and water. Let your soap be Resinol MEN OF BRAINS IGARS -MADE AT KEY WEST— comicbooks.com