Life, 1926-09-02 · page 9 of 41
Life — September 2, 1926 — page 9: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains a humorous travel guide titled "LIFE'S Gris Nez-to-Dover Tour: A Pleasure Trip for Hot Water Babies," referencing the recent English Channel swimming achievement by Miss Gertrude Ederle and Mr. Handley. The satirical article provides absurdist "instructions" for an imaginary swimming route, mixing genuine geographical references (Cape Gris Nez, Dover, Mermaid Marie's) with fabricated dangers (jellyfish, mermaids, sea serpents, sharks, bears on icebergs). Two illustrations depict swimmers in comedic situations. The lower cartoon shows beachgoers and includes dialogue about lifeguards and hope, likely mocking the perceived dangers swimmers face. The satire mocks both the swimming craze sparked by Ederle's achievement and the sensationalized media coverage of such feats.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Li LIFE’S Gris Nez-to-Dover Tour A Pleasure Trip for Hot Water Babies (Speaking of the recent successful swimming of the English Channel by Miss Gertrude Ederle, Mr. Hand- ley, her coach, declared that he mapped out her route carefully beforehand and that all she had to do was to follow the “complete set of instructions” which he had written for her.) Take off from Cape Gris Nez, using your dis- 0 0) cretion as to what you take off. 1.6. Turn sharp left, following whale tracks to abandoned rotor ship. Continue to 3.7. Detour to the right to avoid jellyfish, celwives and broken glass. Be careful of floating pineapples, watermelon rinds and semi-submerged grapefruit. Come out into International Marine Parkway at Permanent Base 17, Rum Fleet. Picture ahead ‘ake middle current (if it happens id Marie’s. Hot dogfish and salt-water 2 Beware of the sea serpent. Turn left past stewed clam lying against bell buoy until you get into 11.2. Rough water. Put on your skid chains and rol] over on your back. Look out for sharks. 15.6. Detour. Channel under repair. Skirt iccberg (if vou are still wearing a skirt) and bear right (if there happens to be a bear on the iceberg) to Bad water. Don’t drink it. Go back to 6.0, 29.5. Large Yellow Barn, Don’t ask me how that anent Base 17 of Rum Fleet. (Just say you are got there. Look out for splinters and protruding nails. nd of Mr. Ware's.) Full steam ahead to Go under bridge to ‘ Coral Gables. Engine trouble. Miss three 33.1. Appomattox Courthouse. Turn to the left and tun s of the tide and then go to then to the right and then to the left and then to the wil. Large patch of floating seaweed. Get out and — right and then to the left and then to the right, bow, dip Look out for necdlefish in occasional haystacks. and shake your feet—Ma-a-a-a-ammy! (And they call ntinue to it the Charleston!) This will bring you to +. Uncle Joc’s. Water ice-cream cones and hot 3 Dover breakwater. Choice lots, homesites and Ladies’ parlor. Rest here until a red, red business opportunities. Keep right on going to robin comes bob, bob, bobbin’ along. Follow robin to 86.3. Main Street, Dover. Ye Olde Anchore Inne— Hors Dovers a specialty. Shore din- ners, dancing and antiques. And what of it? Henry William Hanemann. Pocahontas (to Powhatan): youn STANCE 18 ALL RIGHT, DAD, BUT YOU'LL HAVE TO KEEP THAT LEFT ARM RIGID AND OVER-LOCK YOUR GRIP. Different Standards TERSON, having formed a liking for his caddy, got him a position for the winter months as head pin-boy in the bowling alleys of his club. Two nights later he missed him and inquired of the steward, who said: “Sorry, sir, but we had to let him go. Five balls disappeared the first night he was on ‘duty and when three more were missed this after- noon it became necessary to take action.” E: you averse to necking “DON’T YOU GET TIRED OF COMING HERE EVERY SUMMER?” partie: “WELL, YOU KNOW—WHILE THERE’S A LIFE GUARD THERE'S HOPE.” Sue: Well, who are the parties? comicbooks.com