Life — January 7, 1926 — page 8: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Suitor Auto Dealer (absently) MAY 1 MARKY YOUR DAUGHTER? YES, BUT 1 CAN'T GUARANTEE DELIVERY UNTIL 1927. The Car of Cars E is the latest and the best lit- buy on the market,” indicated iastic automobile salesman. “The paint job's a little startling,” I remarked. “[ grant you that the cover's a bright J,” said the salesman. he body is yellow with broad purple stripes and the wheels are pink. But ah!” “What'll she do? “Absolutely not a bit more than twenty miles an hour,” the salesman vowed. “But ah!” “Humph! Stand up well?” “The springs and the tires will not. stand rough usa Heavy weights flung into the tonneau will crash through the floor boards. But ah! “No self-starter, I see. “Not sign of one, and I might add that she takes some cranking before she catches.” And the salesman gloated an- other “ah!” “Great grief!” I exclaimed. You offer me this perfectly terrific bus and you want a big price for it. What do you mean, ‘But al “AH!” the salesman fairly chortled. “I ask you is any crook going to swipe this car from you? Are any bandits going to appropriate this to make a jewelry or fur haul? Is any gunman likely to jump into this sterling car to make a get- Will any of the children want to take this out for a joy ride?” “Ah? 1 pxaned, reaching for my check book. “Ah!” the salesman echoed, accept- ing the check The ahs had it awa Fairfax Downey. HE first offers to European country that y its war debts in anthra cite coal can count on our support in the next war. Welfare Worker: att, MY POOR MAN, WHAT WAS YOUR TROUBLE? Prisoner AUTOMOBILE, “WELL, WELL! THAT WAS UNFORTUNATE, BUT WHAT ARE YOU IN HERE FOR?” 1 KILLED A MAN WHILE DRIVING The Poets’ Corner "M rather bad at metaphor ; I'm very weak on similes: In writing verses I am hors De combat—even as in these. —I don't know ye and bright. Your eyes are blue Of anything so t My love is deep as My love—my night! that won't go. love—is—oh, good I cannot woo you, dear, in rhyme I never find a phrase that’s pat I think you're perfect I'll have to let it ge and sublime— at that. The poets have a corner on The honeyed phrasing of amour. The ancient flight of nymph and faun In verse regains its swift allure. But just remember, when I read The clever boys aloud to you, That, while I don't possess their speed, I've got some swell emotions, too. Lois Whitcomb The Ideal Job aL: = hours are from too carly in the morning for a girl to be expected t« wash the breakfast dishes until too late for her to help her mother get the din- ner. The salary is too low for her to feel she ought to contribute at home and high enough to permit her to wear as few clothes as any girl in the office. The to make her mother insist on the utmost recreation and easy enough to allow her strength for the Charleston. work is hard enough The boss is handsome and single. The office is close to the station, with three good drug stores in the same block. McCready Huston All's Fair— FIRST SALESMAN heat): What did you mean by telling Mr. Jones tha my firm's product was AN no good? Sefony SAvesMANs” What did you mean by telling him that it was? comicbooks.com