Life — November 26, 1925 — page 29: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Sea Story T= Big American Newspaper Edi- tor had been shipwrecked on a re- luxuriant islet of the South Pa- cific. Being, of course, a man of tre- mendous understanding, he required but hort time to master the language of the simple people who inhabited the istet. He exhibited great interest in their manners, customs, and mode of mote, ‘Of course,” he remarked to one of the prominent men of the village in which he had settled, “you have here no such thing as the newspaper.” The native admitted that it was so. “How do you deal with your murder- ers?” asked the editor. “Murderers?” replied the brown man, somewhat shocked. “We have never had a murder on the island.” “You don't tell me!” gasped the “Well—er—what sort of penal n do you have?” dear sir,” said the native, aightening to his full height, “there has never been a criminal among us.” The American mopped his brow. “Er—you have courts of law,” he continued, “to redress wrongs and see th ere is justice to a certain extent?” brown man looked at him editor what use would we possibly for them?” he asked. “There has never to my knowledge been a complaint of injustice here.” “B-but how do you deal with unhappy A GOOD ALL AROUND MAN marriages?” asked the editor weakly. “I'm afraid,” replied his host, smiling, hat our marriages are not marriages in your sense of the word.” “And—and you have no liquor law violators, no war department, no graft- ing public officials?” “None,” replied the islander. The great journalist rose, red-faced, trembling. “By gad, sir,” he roared, “you don’t deserve to have a newspaper!” E. M. Curtis. 27 Florida Glossary GENT—One who, or that which, acts; a poseur; a faker. Functions best during booms (which see). Boom—A rising noise; explosion. “Full of sound and fury, signifying nothing,” as the Swan of Avon so cleverly puts it. Deal—The process by which you ex- change land that you never had for moncy that you will never get. Lot—A great deal, an ample amount. Humorous or ironic. Prospects—Expectations, or things which you are certain will never eventualize. A password of agents. Real-estate—Bounded property, espe- cially remarkable for its unreality or non-existence. Sucker—A common confection, held in the mouth and licked at intervals by the tongue. dll-day sucker—one that lasts. Simonetta, Playing Safe AFTER: I'm becoming so near- sighted that I bump into people when I walk along the street. Suarter: man! That's dangerous. Why don't you buy a car and drive it? Well, What ? HAT if it should develop that, owing to the recent renovation of the White House, President Coolidge cannot find that box of Christmas tree trimmings left from last year? Goodness, SUNNY FLORIDA PROFESSIONAL JEALOUSY comicbooks.com