Life — September 10, 1925 — page 14: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

12 DAILY LIFE Frame Up Dragnet In Love Loot Probe (Special to DAILY LIFE) The Art Institute in Chicago is one of the show places of that city. It was incorporated in the year 1879, and contains among its famous treasures more than 1,800 paintings, 1,000 casts of sculpture, 100 original marble statues and fragments of all periods, 3,500 prints, etchings, engravings and lithographs, 1,500 textiles of ancient an modern times, Che © Hushes Peruvian and Egyptian to the Eighteenth Century, and ex- tensive collections of porcelains, potteries, china, etc. a great part of the last-named bein assembled in Gunsaulus Hall, among the Blanxius collection of English potteries and porce- lains, one of the finest extant. SUBMERGED? GIBRALTAR.—Sailors cross- ing straits here report that the continent of Africa has disap- peared. They picked up an old fez floating on the sea, indicat- ing that the continent sank. Winners of the WHO HAS THE BIGGEST NECK IN THIS COUNTY? Contest will be an- nounced in DAILY LIFE. soon, | b: and the Republic of France awarded to the winner. =—> PICTURES* PRIZES* PUNCH All letters to the Club, con- ducted by Helpful Harriette, will be invariably regarded as strictly confidential except when published. They will be invari- ably published except when their contents conflict with the United States Postal regula- tions. CLEAN, WHOLESOME STEEPLEJACK Lonesome Club: A clean, wholesome steeplejack of- 54 summers, thrice left a widower unfortunate accidents, would like a clean, wholesome wife to bring his lunches to him and Kiddies, Win This Pony! “Little Gem,” the handsome Sealyham pony, which will go to the lucky new and fascinating DAILY LIFE contest. Kiddy who wins this Hello, Kiddies! How'd ya like to have a nice, genuine Sealyham pony to ride round on? Sounds’ kinda good, eh wot? Well, here’s where nice old Mr. Editor Man of DAILY LIFE is gonna let you in on a new and fascinating contest that'll be the berries. “Little Gem,” the dandy Sealyham pony pictured above, will go to the lucky Kiddy (boy or girl, makes no diff.) who submits the best 120,000 word thesis on “The Syntax of the Temporal Clause in the Epi- stemology (sub specie aeterni- tatis) of the Sophists, Stoics and Epicureans.” Hop to it, kiddies—it’s easy as pie. There’s just only one tiny condition: the contest isn’t open to anyone over six years of age. So enclose your birth certificate with your theses. Any kiddy can submit as many theses as he or she wants. In the event of a tie, “Little Gem” will be divided between the tying — contestants—six months of the year to the mother, and six to the father (who will be the legal guardian and must pay for “Little Gem’s” education). otherwise be a real pal. Won- derful chance to view the city and appreciate scenery. HANDSOME HAL. CLEAN, WHOLESOME GENT Lonesome Club: Isn’t there somewhere in this great, big city a clean, wholesome, perfect gentleman who won't try to get resh with a pretty little lassie from the country who has only been in New York 16 years and is of a trusting but unlucky dis- Position? Jewish, Roman Cath- olic or Protestant preferred, but am not bigoted. The last walrus I picked tried to flirt with me and then turned out to have less than $2 in his kick. TIMIDITY, CLEAN, WHOLESOME HUMORIST Lonesome Club: I am a cl wholesome jolly girl, brim f of fun and always the lady, drunk or sober. ‘ould like to meet a fellow with a keen sense of humor who would appreciate my wealth of stories about two funny Irishmen and would not make wise cracks about them, like a certain party I might name. I have an old file of “Puck” at home, and we could have such merry, simple even- ings together. Or he could take me around to cabarets and shows if he feels he doesn’t want to be a damned piker. ALWAYS ROMPING. A man I know named Horace Flowers would sit an’ frown an’ scowl for hours an’ kick his dog an’ beat his wife an’ see the dismal side o’ life. Until one day a friend came up an’ said, “Just smile, you gloomy pup. Chase gloom away, be gay an’ bright, and everything will tum out right.” So Horace heard this friendly dope an’ started in to nourish hope an’ pleasantly he started in to learn to chuckle, smile an’ grin. An’ then one day he came uptown to find his little home burned down, the while his family weeped an wailed, an’ pretty soon his busi ness failed, an’ he went out an tried to beg, an’ then he went an’ broke fis leg, an’ couldn't pay his income tax, an’ so he took a keen-edged axe an’, just to bring this to an end, he murdered that obnoxious friend. comicbooks.com