Life — July 9, 1925 — page 19: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

WHAT IT USED TO BE Aftemoons in Bellevue Crazy Harry on Autographed Patients SEE,” Crazy Harry remarked pro- foundly to the Fried Egg, “that a physician writing in a medical maga- zine advocates all doctors’ signing their patients after an operation by means of a tattooed letter.” The Fried Egg, who read only cook books, disliked these literary discus- sions. “Do you think the patient would like being tattooed?” he asked absently. But in reality he was wondering whether it wouldn't have been better, after all, to enjoy a career as an ome- let rather than as a plain, ordinary fried egg. Crazy Harry, however, scarcely noticed the interruption. “It is an excellent idea,” he continued hastily, almost before the Fried Egg had finished. “Just think of the possi- bilities it opens up. How often do you suppose doctors find themselves criti- cizing the manner in which some previ- ous operation on a patient had been performed, only to discover that they themselves were the ones who had Ferformed it?” The Fried Egg struggled earnestly to supply the answer, but soon apolo- getically gave it up. “I'm sure I don’t know,” he said. “How often?” “And think,” Crazy Harry rattled on, “how it would boom the medical busi- ness if patients fond of organ recitals adopted a craze for collecting phy- sicians’ autographs. What delight one woman would take in saying to another, ‘Do you know, my dear, my health has been terrible lately. I have been signed by every doctor in town. Let me show you the cute way Dr. Gray wrote his initial right on my arm here the time I had blood poisoning.” The Fried Egg’s attempt to ponder this was not successful, and Crazy Harry presently resumed: “Tramps, you know, co-operate with each other by putting marks on the gate-posts of houses they have visited, indicating the kind of treatment they have received within. These autographs of doctors could be used in much the same way.” Crazy Harry sighed. “If such a system of lettering patients had only been adopted earlier,” he said, “I might have become a doctor.” “I am afraid,” replied the Fried Egg gently, “that a great many of your patients might have been. sent to the dead-letter office.” Tracy Hammond Lewis. The Opportunist 'HE weather is more settled now.” “Yes; I just came across the street and it was nice all the way.” DINING § DANCING AL MINSKS TR Wiki Al a)! ee To Mrs. Coolidge F'isst Lady of the Land, they say, And none has held more charming sway. Homage and titles free are lent To her, our Madam President. Hers, too, might be this nomination— Smileswoman of the Administration. At all events, in any case, A most attractive saving Grace. F. D. After a Fashion EPORTER: Was Slowtown’s Old Home Week all you'd hoped for? Cuairman: The Waffle Shoppe reaped a harvest, Doc Sinclair got the indigestion cases, Widow Phelps sold those antiques she got stuck on three years ago, and the constable confiscated fifteen quarts of alleged liquor, with strong probability of the bail money's being forfeited. Draw your own con- clusions. OLD HOME WEEK—AND NOBODY HOME comicbooks.com