Life, 1925-07-02 · page 22 of 47
Life — July 2, 1925 — page 22: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
**"A Modern Decalogue"** (by Ted Robinson) is a satirical rewriting of the Ten Commandments that exposes hypocrisy in early 20th-century American society. Each commandment is followed by a parenthetical commentary revealing how people actually behave—contradicting the stated rule. Examples: "Honor Father and Mother" is undercut by suggesting they deserve honor merely for producing "such a wonder as you"; "Do not steal" is mocked by noting that profiteering yields "a much higher per cent." The satire targets moral relativism, greed, and the gap between professed values and actual behavior. **"The Perfect Conference Room"** is a separate satirical dialogue between an architect and office manager. The architect has designed an absurdly tiny, uncomfortable "conference room" (4'6" square, bolted furniture, uninhabitable ventilation). The joke mocks inefficient office design and corporate pretense—creating the appearance of facilities while providing no actual function. Both pieces exemplify *Life* magazine's social commentary on American capitalism and hypocrisy.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A Modem Decalogue {OU shalt have but one God; 'tis a sin to have two. (But to have none at all? Oh, well, that’s up to you.) Make thee no graven image for meek adoration. (Well, we don't make the coins—that is done by the nation.) Do not swear. It is wrong to be fuming and fussing. (So live that your neighbor must do all the cussing.) Keep the Sabbath for rest from all cares that are irking. (For you can’t make much moncy when nobody’s work- ing.) Honor Father and Mother. (For honor is due, Don't you think, that they reared such a wonder as you?) No weapon to slay any man shalt thou draw; This is written. (Of course, there’s an “unwritten law.”) Thou shall not take the wife of thy neighbor away. (Remember, divorce laws are easy, to-day.) Do not steal. (It is foolish, in any event— Profiteering will nct a much higher per cent.) Thou shalt bear no false witness. quiz, And the other man’s crime will look worse than it is.) (Keep still, when they Thou shalt covet no riches that others produce. (Make them yours, if you can; if you can't, what's the use?) Ted Robinson. EY Y day this country has more beauty parlors and fewer beauties. THE TOBACCO ECONOMIST The Perfect Conference Room “YES, but..." And here the office manager gasped. “...you have omitted the conference room.” “Pardon me; no,” said the architect, pointing to a spot on the blue print. “Here is the conference room. This little space between the stock depart- ment and the night porter’s locker room.” “That? Why, that can't be more than five feet square.” “Four feet six, to be exact. That's the beauty of it. It will really accommodate but one person comfortably at a time. In fact, comfortably is perhaps the wrong word. Better say it will ac- commodate one person uncomfortably at a time.” “Well, but...” “There will be no space for a conference table; and therefore no big desk blotters on which to draw diagrams and funny pictures. There will be a chair, a hard, wooden one, but it will be bolted to the floor, It will be impossible to tilt it back against the wall. The problem of ventila- tion gave me considerable trouble at first, but I finally devised a piping system which will sup- ply the room with cold air in winter and super- heated air in summer. In fact, it will be prac- tically uninhabitable. I figure it will... Panic in Was The architect's ha and hearty grasp. pany who spoke. “My boy,” he crie “you have cut the one daring slash yeu this office one hund: repay you?” F “THE real troubk former, “is thaj Miss Bunay: comicbooks.com