Life, 1925-05-28 · page 14 of 36
Life — May 28, 1925 — page 14: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three distinct pieces: 1. **"Ode to an Oyster"** by Arthur L. Lippmann—a humorous poem celebrating an oyster's safe, sedentary existence in its shell, contrasting it with the dangers faced by other sea creatures. 2. **"A Suggestion"** - A brief satirical exchange where a "Ranting Reformer" demands moral purification of entertainment (stage, screen, dance, bathing suits), and another voice dismissively responds "cut it short." 3. **"Mrs. Peps Diary"** - A personal essay dated May 21st describing the author's discovery of inexpensive caviar at market and subsequent lunch plans with Florence Brown, ending with commentary on a woman's "Queen-of-the-May complex." 4. **A three-panel comic** titled "The Man Who Couldn't Do Big Things Except at Lunch" depicting someone unable to accomplish tasks except during meals.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
= Leb EB. * Ode to an Oyster oO": give a thought to the gentle oyster, Snug for a while in a muddy bed— Puffing his pipe in his clammy cloister, Safer by far than the quadruped. Oh, how he loafs as he lolls inanely, Deep in his liquid lair immersed— Whether eugenic or slightly ptomainely, Safe is he now till September first. He flouts the flounders and herring haughty That swim above in serried rows, And at the crabs and eels this naughty Chap attempts to thumb his nose. But all they say is: “Just remember It doesn’t pay to be too smart, And that you'll be, say next September, The preface to an @ la carte.” Arthur L. Lippmann A Suggestion ANTING REFORMER: The stage must be purified! The sereen must be cleansed! The dance must be cen- sored! The bathing suit must be— Voice: Aw, cut it short. HE original model of the telephone has been offered to the museum of the University of Kentucky. However, as it differs materially from the model of to-c the atti tude of the Kentucky Legislature toward evolution will F % : probably prevent the acceptance of the gift. JERR "ROUT RPM DYIN’ SO) SUPDEN—WHAT THE ° CORONER'S JURY SAY?” r= = 7; WE WAVE YouR LETTER re > OF THE NINTH AND- UNDER VERY SUSPICIOUS CIKCUMSTANCE>, 4 WG) #R-ER- (VE GoT To GET THIS RIGHT- ER~ May Up betimes, and off to investigate the report that 2st caviar can be bought at the Queensborough Market for an outlay of only one dollar and : z ten cents the pound, and found it true, to my delight, so “= ITS REALLY bought as many jars as I could transport without being \ GP IMPORTANT, CHAD mistaken for a pedlar, and did derive from the reasonable prices hanging over the various stands a feeling that I had strayed into a bit of heaven on earth, Resolved to buy the bulk of our provisions there in the future instead of from the robbers in our neighborhood. Thence to an inn to lunch with Florence Brown, and we agrecd, as usual, upon many things, in especial that most people are inclined to place = too great a value upon pure reason. I never come home “AND Wik SAY ve | from a visit to a sensible family, quoth F., that I do not (tod — You Wik FIND ove thank God that my children are all fools....Agnes Marshall : ee are to dine with us, and she did keep up such a chatter about 2» won pie what this man had said to her and that man had given het that I was at some pains not to blush for such sex egotism. Do you know what is the matter with her? asked Sam after she departed, and when T paused a bit, he added, She has the Queen-of-the-May complex. (Continued on page 29) THE MAN WHO COULDN'T DO BIG THINGS EXCEPT AT LUNCH “WALL, THEY AGKEES IT WAS A VISITATION OF Gop comicbooks.com