Life — April 16, 1925 — page 30: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

LIFE “Sr1g, SIRATHE TRAIN A Minute.” “THAT'S ALL RIGHT—MY GIRL 1S ON THE 12:40.” Mundo (Madrid), LEAVES 1N Taxt Driver (to rival): Where the perishing ‘ell d’yer think ye're goin’? This blue-faced idiot ‘ailed me first— didn’t yer, guv’nor? —Passing Show (London). OUR_ CONTEM FOOLISH PORARIES Literary Chats on a Subway Local “Whatcher readin’ ?” Michael Arlen. He's come to Amer- You know: Arlen of ‘The Green Oh, the milliner!” —New York Sun. Answered Sne: Don’t you think it’s always difi- cult to tell a woman's age? He: It is for her. —Boston Transcript. Ir is easy to pick out the foreign-born. They cuss capital instead of Congress. El Dorado Tribune. highest standard of quality, unsurpassed in design RES | PALM BEACH Guennette Dusting Discoveries at Ur In patriarchives questing For records interesting, Explorers come on files Of hard-baked invoice tiles, And here and there is one Account that’s overdone, And one, with corner smash, Implics discount for cash. Yon heap of shards—the fruits OF family disputes— Attests domestic strife ‘Twixt Syrian man and wife, Who, careful of their platters In these domestic matters, Each pelted other's head With clay receipts instead, From which we may infer How human ‘twas to Ur. —A. W., in London Daily Chronicle, The Travelers Four-year-old Bobby and eight-year-old Janet were amusing themselves with a game of “travels” in the garden, Suddenly Janet cried: “Ob, dear! 1 must go back. I've forgotten my face powder.” “I must go back!” Bobby immediately ed. “I've forgotten my powder, ly !" Janet told him proudly. “Boy don’t use face powder.” “Well, then,” replied Bobby, quite humbly, “what is it I've forgotten?” —L’Echo de Paris. Cellarette, sideboard or ocean stea: plete without Abbott's Bitters. Aids di 3. te without tion. Samy) . . tee C.W, Abbott & Co., Baltimore, Md. How America Was Discovered (A Country School Essay) In 1492 Columbus he discovered In- diana which they was some men on it with feathers in theer hair and not much clothes. They says they were Indians su Columbus he thought he was theer all right and he sails back and tells the king he was there and the king he says that was very nice and so it belongs to England and that is why we speak English—American Legion Weekly. Down on the Farm “The only worker I ever knew who would work when the boss was away was the old-fashioned American hired inan,” declared a professor at Grand Rap- ids. We have known a couple of them to sit on a fence at such times and work until their jaws were totally exhausted. —E. C. A., in Detroit News. The Tiff Slimkins and his young wife had just completed their first quarrel. “I wish I were dead,” she sobbed. “I wish I was, too,” he blurted out. “Then I don’t wish [ was,” and the war continued. —Pearson's Weekly (London). Gastroxomic candor in New Haven: “For supper—and all through the night: A toasted cheese sandwich.” —New York World, mer kit Is Incom= comicbooks.com