Life — January 29, 1925 — page 32: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Yao. OURS "Pa Pre-eminent among Bermuda's excel- lent hotely—n.west, most modern, entirely fireproof. Siruaticn unsur- assed, giving wonderful views of the Flarbour, and surrounded by fifteen acres of beautiful grounds. cuisine and service. Finest The Complete Raconteur Two men were talking at the club. “When I am telling a man a story said one of them, “I if I a peculiar gleam in his cyes.” Does it mean that he has hea story before?” inquired the other. No,” answered the first; “it means that he isn't listening, | thinking of the one be intends to tell me."—Tatler (London). stop short see d the cause he is With a Purpose Hus: Were you wise, dear, in giving our guests rooms so near to the nursery? Wire: It's the onl we can get them up in time for breakfast —Boston Transcript. way Mrs. Dildge: ont. ricur; 11's ONLY MY BILL, ’e’S ALLUS A-TRIPPIN’ OVER THAT PRAYER-MAT WOT ‘E BROUGHT ’OME FROM MESPOTAMIA! —Lunt, in The Magpic (London). Isadore Brelan, inveterate gambler, having shown proper repentance in his final hour, was admitted to Paradise. But, alas! after some time, the joy of taking part in the celestial concert was not sufficient for his happiness, so he ap. | proached St. Peter. . Peter,” he sai am not None of my friends are here. Could you tell me where | may find Bloch, Isaac and Kahn, with whom I used to play poker every day?” “None of those names is on our books,” answered the Holy Keeper of the Ce lestial Gates, “but perhaps, if you will | take the elevator to the left on the way | out and go down five thousand floors, you | will find your friends. And take this return ticket—because without it you can't get back here.” Fortified with the precious ticket, Isa- dore Brelan took the elevator. It let ~ him out near his friends, who were busy | He wanted to play....“Show your | money,” said one of the players. “I haven't any money,” swore Isadore. “Up there in Heaven we don’t use it.” “Too bad! This is a hard cash propo- sition, down here.” Poor Isadore, entirely without clothes and not even able to offer his effects to 1 pawn shop, took himself off, sad and afflicted. Suddenly he had a triumphant idea, and with a smile on his lip came back to his old comrades with a big roll of bills in his hand. “How did you get that money? Isaac. “Oh. ticke he asked said Isadore, “I sold my return —Le Rire (Paris). Ina Pinch, use ALLEN'’S FOOT¢EASE | } Unfit to Deliver Mrs. New called at the grocer’s to make a complaint. “[ ordered a dozen oranges from you to-day,” she said, sharply, “and you only sent me eleven. How was that?” “Well, explained the grocer, “one of them was so bad that I took the liberty of throwing it away for you.” —Tit-Bits (London). ma’am, of Soda with tablespoontal Abbott's Bitters a { palatable. Sample Bitters by mail, 25 “OW, Abbott & Co, Baltimore, Md. S mis CW House Party Strategy “That tiresome guest of ours,” wifey, “just received a telegram saying that he was wanted in town.” “Well?” responded hubby. wonder if he sent it.” “No, 1 sent it” —Louisville Courier-Journal. said Cuartapy: I don't mind comin’ now an’ again to oblige yer. Lavy: It’s very good of you, But what I really require is daily conde- | ‘scension—Punch The Flop It was in the chorus dressing-room, just before the second performance of the latest musical comedy. Some of the slim beauties were giving themselves im- mense airs over mentions in various critiques of the production. Big Amy, the wardrobe woman, was a sympathetic listener, always saying “Splendid!” and not forgetting to roll her eyes and gasp with delight in the proper places. Suddenly she turned to a pouting pony, who was applying expression to her features in the darkest corner of the 1 what sort of notice did you get, she inquired The pony turned to her a tear-swollen ” she said dully. York Morning Telegraph With an Eye to Business The following from the Pasadena Star ws speaks for itself : “Loxe Beacu.—A vertical race is sched. uled for next Sunday at a local flying field. Competing airmen will mount to $000 feet turn the noses of their craft to the ground and scoot down. The first one to land will win a silver cup,” The man who is donating the cup is J. J. Mottell, a local undertaker.” —New York Evening World. Tue New Butter: ner late, madam? Very New Mistress: Certainly not! Give me my meals punctual! —London Opinion. Do you have din- are more popular ~ A graceful slender girl holds a fascination which oniy slender women have. Men admire a youthful silhouette. Instinctively, they are drawn towards the woman whose figure is graceful and shapely. ‘That's why slender girls are always popular. But why worry about being overweight? It’s easy to reduce. Use Marmola Tablets Ghousands ed a aed — cach yer regain healthy, slender figures this wa} These tablets will make you slender ap. Try them. No exercises or diets. All drug stores have them— ‘one dollar abox. Or Doe den sent in plain wrap- postpai: Marmola Co., 1843 Bcactal Motors bldg., Detroit, Mich. comicbooks.com