Life, 1924-09-25 · page 8 of 37
Life — September 25, 1924 — page 8: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains three separate satirical pieces: 1. **Top cartoon** ("That doesn't sound like 'silver threads among the gold' to me"): Shows a waiter serving coffee while a diner complains about the beverage's poor quality, satirizing restaurant service standards. 2. **"Bedtime Story"**: A narrative satire about a businessman-poet who writes a beautiful letter to secure a mining town girl's employment in the city. She sues him for breach of promise, collecting fifty thousand dollars. The joke mocks romantic deception and mercenary attitudes. 3. **"A Rude Awakening," "Pride of Ownership,"** and brief sketches: Short comedic vignettes about everyday social interactions and character types. The page exemplifies Life's satirical approach to American social pretensions, romance, and class dynamics of its era.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Prt decd “9 “THAT DOESN'T SOUND LIKE ‘SILVER THREADS BUT 1 GOT THE “THAT'S JUST WITAT IT Is, AMONG THE GOLD’ TO ME.” BASSES MINED WHEN I PUT THIS INSTRUMENT TOGETHER.” Bedtime Story NCE upon a time there was a big business man who was also a poet. One day he was driving through a little mining town, and there amidst the squalor and dirt he saw a most beautiful and innocent girl “*Full many a flower is born to blush unseen,’ quoted the business man. “It isn’t right that such an exquisite crea- ture should be left to languish in a dismal place like this. She ought to be surrounded with pearls and ermine. I can't give her the pearls and ermine because I would be misunderstood, but I can at least get the girl a job.” So he went to the girl and told her that she was too beautiful for a mining town and that he would like to take her to the city. She asked him to write her a letter to that effect, to show to her parents, so they wouldn't think she was just running away. So he wrote the letter, and, being a poet, he made it a very beautiful and touching letter. And the girl sued him for breach of promise and collected fifty thousand dollars, and went to live among beauti- ful things. But, curiously enough, the man was sore. Maybe it was because she bought diamonds and sealskins instead of pearls and ermine. Undoubtedly that must have been it. B. B. A Rude Awakening HE called herself Moira Colum. Mystic, vague, with trailing robes and hair, she lived in her dreams. She day-dreamed and she dreamed at night. Her fancy was peopled with’ shadowy imagery. She was not of this world. This went on for some time. And then...an friend of Moira Colum psychoanalyzed her dreams. She had a long and slow convales- cence. But she calls herself Mary Kelley, now. And they he can go- get more live advertising than any three salesmen in the Red Hot Advertising Agency. HOW.H ambitious RAMP: Pardon me, I ha anything to cat for over a week Assent-Minpep Gent N (walk- Oh, don’t mention it. ven't had ing on): Life Scr A Restaurant. Time: ing. ° Enter: The Emperor Caligula, Ja son Cowles, Awston Cavntlett, They sit. CLEANTHI yer have? (a waiter): Wot" Cauicuta: Coffee. Cauicuta (to Cor Cow es: Coffee. Caricuta (to Cawntlett): Cawntiett: Coffee. Cauicuta (to Cleanthe Creantues (to Caligula, Cawntlett): Coffee? Cauicuta, Cowtes, Cawntiett ( Cleanthes): Coffce! CLeantues (to barman): COF Barman (to Cleanthes) ; COF Creantues (to barman) : COFFE BarMan (to kitchen man): CO! Coffee? Coffer : Coffee. Cowl: co ARMAN (to kitchen man): CO (Pause.) Kitcnen Man (to barman): CO FE (Sets out three cups of coff BarMan (to Cleanthes) : COFFE (Sets coffce on counter.) Creantues (to Caligula, Cow Cawntlett): Coffee! (Sets coffee | each.) (They drink. desk.) CaricuLa (to cashier): Coffee. () fosits coin.) Cow es (to cashier): its coin.) CawntLetr (to (Deposits coin.) Exeunt: The Emperor Caligula, Jo- son Cowles, Awston Carntlett, They go to cashi. Coffee. (/ cashier): Cofic Arthur R. Turner. Pride of Ownership RAFFIC OFFICER: What is you name ?—You were doing thirty-eight miles an hour. Proup Motorist: You're crazy; was doing better than that—I just had it overhauled. ANY a janitor is coming out of re tirement to settle down for a lon winter's rest. comicbooks.com