Life — August 14, 1924 — page 8: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“LDPE * OLD JOKES AT HOME (Continued from the cover) HE joke on the cover may sound a little like something you have heard before, but there is one aspect of it which is worthy of note: old as the. formula may be, it has here received an entirely new treatment. Whereas in the original form the question, “Has your wife been entertaining this season?” was asked by the lady, we have now completely reversed the spirit and the sense of the thing by assigning the interrogation to the gentleman. This is quite another matter, as you will readily agree. If, however, it is felt that, even revolutionized in this manner, the joke still fails to hold water, this may serve: Cholly Sapleigh: po you HAVE MANY WRECKS ON THIS LINE? Mabel Gotrox (captain of the ship, and tired of passen- gers who ask persistent questions): NO; YOU'RE THE FIRST I'VE SEEN FOR OVER SIX MONTHS. In regard to this selection, we realize that the picture does not represent a scene on shipboard, and that it is silly to make believe that a pretty girl is captain of a ship, but we feel sure that the reader will cheerfully make these con- cessions for the sake of a good laugh. Perhaps, though, it would be as well to change the charac- ters entirely and substitute a new pair of fun-makers: Mrs. Newrich (who is eager to impress the Senator with her interest in public affairs); HAVE YOU HEARD THE LAST Forp Joke? Senator Sorghum: 1 wore so. see We could offer many alternative nifties if we wanted to, but it seems ta us that we have done our part to give your sense of “humor” a run for its money, After all, a joke is a joke. Another Amendment UGGESTED slogan for the Anti-Anti-Saloon League—You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him stop drinking. Rosemary ] WEAR your fragrant memory, like a spray of mignon- ette, As I tread the winding ribbon of the years. How clear the radiant image of you stands before me yet In the thousand little mirrors of my tears. And ah, my dearest love, when I forget the way to drean I'll forget your silent nearness in the dark, Where languorous lilies floated on a quiet stream,— Or were you the one I'd meet in Central Park? The love of you was sudden and the heart of you was strong ; There were leaping little devils in your eyes; Your laughter rode the morning like a joyous May-day song,— No, I guess that must have been two other guys. woodland Could I forget your April smile, the shining way of you, Could I forget your method so adroit? Could I forget those stories of the other girls you knew?— Or was that the butter-and-egg man from Detroit? A pair of truant children, we would often steal away Where the city’s voice was gloriously mute, And plan the little cottage we should have, one happy day,— Or were you the boy that had the wife in Butte? You had my first, my golden love, and though we're tom apart, Through all the circling years, I've been the same. Your name is ever written on the pages of my heart,~ And, by the way, my dear, what was your name? Dorothy Parker. Fifty-Fifty OCTOR: What scems to be the matter? Mr. Coun: If I tell you, is it half rate? E Skeptics’. Society is puzzled to know what to do about the Man of the Hour. A recent sample turned out to be good for only forty-three minutes. ANITARY DRINKING CUPS—ONE OF THE IDEAS HIRAM PICKED UP WHEN HE VISITED THE CITY LAST WINTER. comicbooks.com