Life, 1924-01-10 · page 39 of 44
Life — January 10, 1924 — page 39: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page features a humorous essay by someone (likely male, given context) complaining about having an approachable, open face that invites strangers to impose upon him constantly. He's pestered for directions, the time, matches, and money by subway riders, store customers, and street urchins. Even trying to help in emergencies backfires when people assume he's a perpetual Good Samaritan. The satire mocks middle-class anxieties about urban anonymity and unsolicited social contact in early 20th-century New York City. The author fantasizes about becoming a pirate or cabdriver instead—occupations with less "approachable" personas. A small cartoon below depicts an old-fashioned person who "blew out the gas" in a hotel bedroom; someone quips he "gets run over on Fifth Avenue"—dark humor about outdated behavior. The page is otherwise filled with period advertisements (Maillard chocolates, Madison Avenue establishments).
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
That Kind of Face nti I want to be a pirate, or a or a taxicab chauffeur ro being ar tof face and manner. Frankly red of sharing with Mary Pickford the title of 1 would even consid tion picture producer if it would give me that tion's: Sweetheart rt-ask me what it is that makes me fair game for every stray man, woman or child. Introspection can bx h sce for yourself what happens There! What did I telly Id run shricking from he carried too far t plant me in a busy thoroughfare and 1? That lisping tot wh own father has approachee as asked me to take her hand Hang it! Do I look lib ow Im r dence and utter the stree 1 kr neither am I and lead her acr that type of persor t exactly a cave-man. but dash it That's the way it goes, all Uncle Remus. the Panic-stricken de n come up to me in the subway and ask Brooklyn. Men old me for the time, or for matches, cayed ge me how t to rer now better a note parts ash futile teeth over a waxing inferiority a little bo out. Let nd I imme leaving me to g plex to the effect that I am ¢ me stop for a moment in public ely becom the center of a surging mob, I hold what on ormation open-air meeting. [even valuable packages for people who have never seen me ble lives. As ss, once. Inside of three m: an inf hefore in their miser stores—I w a department store I was direc the traffic, answering complaints and quot ing prices on the more popular numbers in stock. The worst of it is that I generally have the time, or the match, or two nickels for a ten-cent piece. Even when I am feeling my Jesse Jamesest, the sudden contact of thos sits with my horny palm reduces me of Helpiul Hor ing casting director ore dignified and less promise rose-petal inéant ¢ 1, So I play my pa to cup-c a part I led out to me by a snicke who has a se ous bits You probably nk that in all this milling of first aid to the foolish, I'd have many a neat romantic chance beauty in distress. Perhaps, you say, with a sly dig in the ribs, some pretty girl comes up to me every day or so and tells me that, p is afraid to ride in the bus al ces are evidently nproving That's why I want to be andit, or or a piano mover, or a moving picture p “Wuat's become blow out the gas + old-fashioned party who used to 1 bed: “He gets run over on Fifth Avenue.” “WHY WERE YOU SO LONG ON THAT ERRAND? DIDN'T 1 SAY “HURRY BACK’ ?” “YES, BUT YOU DIDN'T SAY "HURRY THERE LIFE - 29 New yori Chocolates Bon Bons Trench Bonbonnieres Luncheon AfternoonTea 7] f, Madison Avenue at 474 Street Phone Vanderbilt 33 MENS LUNCHEON SERVICE A7D St. Entrance N Alth o at 3508 Si common-sense evidence —on quality f 1 footwear—that the shoes are made for the wearer's convenience—Shoe Lacing Hooks. Your retailer can sell you shoes with lacing hooks. Insist on having what you want! comicbooks.com