Life, 1923-12-27 · page 34 of 37
Life — December 27, 1923 — page 34: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising** with satirical editorial content interspersed. The main satire appears in "Things 'Winter Tourists' Should Get Done Before Going South"—a tongue-in-cheek guide mocking wealthy Americans preparing for winter vacations to South America. The piece satirizes the pretensions of the wealthy elite by advising them to ostentatiously display wealth (smoking expensive cigars, overtipping, casually losing golf balls), name-drop Newport summers, adopt a superior attitude toward locals, and perform tokenistic charity toward Black residents. The humor lies in exposing how the wealthy cultivate an artificial persona of casual superiority. "The Subtle Schoolmaster" humorously describes a teacher's method of managing student curiosity by posting exhaustively detailed, tedious notes on a broken classroom clock—defeating questions through bureaucratic overkill. The remaining content consists of travel advertisements (American Express South America cruise), product ads (Conn saxophones, Bellans indigestion remedy, Cortez cigars), and a serious tuberculosis awareness campaign urging Christmas Seal purchases to protect children.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
LIFE To Wonderlands below the Equator Let’s be “rolling down. to Rio” and melt the winter into June AMERICAN EXPRESS 5th Annual Cruise Tour oa SOUTH AMERICA. Sixty-seven days of amazing and delightful travel, visiting Cuba, Panama, Peru, Chile, across the Andes, Argentine, Uruguay, | Brazil, Trinidad, Barbados From NEW YORK, Feb. 2nd on splendid S. S. Esse- uibo (Pacific Line). Memorable shore excursions with distinguished local receptions. Every detail in expert hands. A complete change and glorious winter holi- days assured. Write today for Booklet AtnticenitxpronTravelDept. | | 65 BROADWAY, NEW YORK Cann Senophons ong con ‘The Conn saxophone is mized by famous artists as the finest in the world. Exclusive features make it easier to rfect in scale, reliable in action. now for your copy of handsome book describing all models, and details of Free Trial, Easy Payments on an; instrument. C.G. CON = 6 BELLANS Hot water Sure Relief SELLANS FOR INDIGESTION 25¢ AND 75¢ PACKAGES EVERYWHERE | HOW MANY PERSONS WILL READ THIS COPY OF LIFE? ‘MEN 1G BRAINS IGARS “MADE AT KEY WEST— Things ‘‘WinterTourists” Should Get Done Before Going South Become “fabulously wealthy.” Go dinner-and-the-theatre every evening for a week before en- training, and stay out until two or three in the morning several times run- ning, and once don’t come home at all; you will find it helps to be able to speak of such things carelessly. out to Learn to refer to your polo ponies as easily as if they were a litter of fox- ide now at just what point on Riverside Drive your house is situated. Learn to smoke dollar cigars; you probably won't like them at first, but it will come in time. Get into the habit of overtipping your caddy; it is expensive, but you will be expected to do it, and you might as well get into the habit. Learn to be contemptuous of new golf balls; when you drive one into the rough, be able to shout carelessly, “Let it go!” and unwrap another; this will require some practice, and you had bet- ter get started on it now. Remember that the people who are unfortunate enough to live in the place the year round are referred to as “1 tives. na- Learn to take a philanthropic interest in the negroes; acquire an_ uplifting frame of mind. Don’t forget that you know all of the first Four Hundred, and that your sum- mers are habitually spent at Newport, or Southampton. Acquire a certain hauteur and dignity, and learn what is meant by the phrase, “Northern coldness.” In short, learn, damn Yankee. if possible, to be a B. F. The Subtle Schoolmaster Tue American schoolboy, as every- body knows, is possessed of an itching and burning curiosity. A wily and ex- perienced master in one of our large schools recently saved himself from being driven crazy by placing on his classroom clock, which had stopped, the following notice: I know the clock has stopped. The clock needs oil. It will be oiled Saturday. I use a regular oil for clocks. 3 in 1 oil would do. The clock was bought in March, 1921. The clock has been running ever since. The clock cost $17.50. (Signed) Yes, Sait. Timely Truism THE joy of giving at Christmas would be somewhat lessened if it were not for the expectation of what we are to get in return. WYNKOOP HALLENBECK CRAWFORD COMPANY NEW YORK. Protect the Children! ‘HE sturdy youngsters and tiny toddlers whose trusting fingers are twined about your very heart- strings play always under the threat- ening shadow of tuberculosis. The dread disease is everywhere. Wealth is no bar and position no barrier to consumption. The only way to make the world safe for children is to stamp out tuberculosis entirely. It can be stamped out. Today only one person dies of tuberculosis where two died before. Christmas Seals have helped to save the other life. Help in this life-saving campaign. Save the children. Buy Christmas Seals. Tuberculosis with Christmas National, State, and Local Tuberculosis Associations of the United States Aftermath at the Moron Club “I suppose it’s all right, but it does seem that there’s too much fuss made over this Christmas business. Got so now that everybody you know expects something. If it isn’t gifts, it’s money, all the way from the head book- keeper down to the office boy.” “Yep, it’s fierce. But then, after all, you know, 2 little kindness does a lot to keep those people contented. If it wasn’t for the good will of the working classes they might be making us Christ- mas presents.” W. G. comicbooks.com