Life, 1923-08-02 · page 5 of 40
Life — August 2, 1923 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertising**, not political satire. The main content includes: **"The Story of the Unfortunate Mr. Jones"** (left): A humorous short story about a man pressured to host a dinner party that spirals into chaos—a relatable social satire about etiquette and obligation rather than politics. **Major advertisements:** - Bristol Steel Golf Shafts and Fishing Rods - T. Garter Co.'s crooked-leg garter solution - Whiting-Adams brushes **Poems included:** - "Who Laughs First" and "The Hand That Rocks The Cradle" appear to be light verse, likely contemporary social commentary in verse form. The page reflects early 20th-century consumer culture and genteel social anxieties rather than political commentary. No specific political figures or events are referenced.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
The Story of the Unfortunate Mr. Jones Tr had been a boring: evening—a very boring evening indeed. In the first place, the dinner had been es- pecially dismal—an uninteresting as- semblage and the dullest of conversa- tion: n a wretched play, during the entr’acte of which it had been impossible to effect an exit; and after- ward, supper—truly the sorriest sup- per poor Jones had ever attended. And it was during supper that some idiot had insisted that the party should all come to his apartment. Jones's heart sank within him, and he began mentally to formulate all varieties of excuses upon which to hang his es- cape. He must leave; that much was certa Suddenly his hostess turned to him, beaming radiantly. “Before I forget,’ she said, “you must promise to join us again next Tues- day for dinner.” Here was his opportunity to nip the \hole business in the bud, to definitely and decidedly disrupt all further relations, to finish it all. Of cours diplomacy was necessary. Mythical business appointments, pseu- do-camping trips, fictitious yachting cruises raced rapidly through his mind. He might even be going abroad, he recollected. Then, everything be- came confused, jumbled, inconclusive. He could think of absolutely no ex- cuse. In truth, he could think of nothing. His imagination had re- fused to function. “I should love to dine with you Tuesday,” he told her. “There’s nothing that would give me greater pleasure.” NEW GARTER MAKES TROUSERS HANG STRAIGHT If Legs Bend In or Out Self-adjustable Itholds Socks Up—Shirt Down Nota “Form” or “Harness” No Metal Springs Dept.28, New London, New Hampshire Monetary Ture is probably no truth in the report that the employees of the Philadelphia mint have organized and Propose to strike, alleging that they can not make any money. : “Give an example of how circum- stances alter cases.” “Milwaukee isn’t famous any more.” GS ate GY ia See Sean Why Be Satisfied With Poor Clubs? Te costs no more and it is a simple matter to make sure of getting first class clubs. A poor club not only causes a well executed shot to go astray, but it ruins your confidence and your game soon falls off. The shaft counts for more than any other part of the club. On it depends the strength, the balance and the “feel”. In these days of such uncertain hickory thousands are turning to the Bristol Steel Golf Shaft, because every one is made exactly the same in quality yet they come in all degrees of whippiness so that any type of hickory shafted club can be duplicated. They will not warp—they are exceptionally strong and dependable. Bristol Steel Shafted Clubs are supplied by The Crawford, McGregor & Canby Co., Dayton, Ohio; A. G. Spalding & Bros., New York; Thos. B. Wilson & Co., Chicago; The Hillerich & Bradsby Co., Louisville, Ky; and The Burke Golf Co., Newark, Ohio. The Horton Manufacturing Company, _ Bristol, Conn. Bis Pinta, Steel Fishing Rods Go fishing—it is an ideal vacation sport, but be i‘ tackle. Bristol Steel Fishing Rods, Meck and Blue Gears Recs ant Knee fisher Silk Fishing Lines come for every kind of fishing. They are known by all fishermen. Bristol’ Meek and Kingfisher Catalogs mailed free on request. “Steel Golf Shaft NOTICE: Basic and Supplementary Patents covering Steel Golf Shafts are controlled exclusively by us. Who Laughs First I've lived my life for two-score years And yet, I wonder, as a youth And now, when harking back To bygone loves, to hopes and fears, My romances—or lack, I smile, amused in mild amaze At youthful sentiment, And chuckle that in those far days I strove at love's intent. lf I had seen me now, A man of season'd loves, in truth, Despite my thinning brow, On bended knee before a maid— My waist a trifle stout— If I'd have smiled; no, I'm afraid I would have laughed right out! Hand That Rocks The Cradle Swing The Brush WHITING-ADAMS BRUSHES Insure even tempers on odd jobs. Send for Illustrated Literature JOHN L. WHITING-J. J. ADAMS CO., Boston, U.S.A, Brush Manufacturers for Over 114 Years and the Largest in the World MRSS fe Ste comicbooks.com