Life, 1923-07-05 · page 24 of 40
Life — July 5, 1923 — page 24: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains two satirical pieces mocking American social change. **"Jonathan and John, 1923"** depicts a conversation between an American (John) and a British character (Old Johnny B.). The satire attacks American Prohibition—the constitutional ban on alcohol that took effect in 1920. Old Johnny B. mocks John's moral righteousness about abstinence while pointing out American hypocrisy: America demands British ships remain "dry" (alcohol-free) in American waters, yet plans to enforce similar laws domestically. The final stanza sarcastically suggests "Democracy" should be renamed "Hypocrisy," and jabs at "the Southern negro vote," implying African American voters' political significance contradicts white Americans' claims to moral superiority. **"Fourth of July in Jonesville"** laments the decline of Independence Day observance. The author notes that thirty years prior, townspeople celebrated communally; now they've abandoned tradition for leisure activities (golf, motoring). The commentary suggests Americans have become indifferent to civic values and patriotic meaning—a broader critique of modern materialism replacing traditional community and national consciousness.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
She: THAT IS A PERFECT IDYL! Farmer: YEP. THAT'S MY SON. HE’S BEEN PRACTICIN’ IDLING NIGH ON TWENTY YEARS, Fourth of July in Jonesville “THE first time I made Jonesville I found all the people talking about the big crowd that would be in town for the Fourth of July. When I called on my customers to-day most of them told me their plans for get- ting away. Thirty years ago it was considered a good time to stand in the sun and hear a leading citizen read the Declaration of Independence; to- day the only time you hear that docu- ment mentioned is when somebody gets naturalized. A fellow would spend the evening on his lawn sending up skyrockets for his children; now- adays he hasn't any lawn and his chil- dren wouldn’t be at home if he had. Sometimes a man would hitch up the surrey and take his family to the country; to-day he steps on the starter and beats them to the first tee at the Country Club. “The big change about these holidays, though, is in the conscience. When I first began to sell goods on the road a merchant would often keep his place open the morning of the Fourth and he would be sort of rest- less when he closed it for the after- noon. Go see the same man now and you'll find he’s figured it out that as the Fourth comes on Wednesday it will hardly pay him to come back to town before the following Mon- day.” McCready- Huston. Famous 4th’s SAFE and sane —. The glorious —. The — dimension. The Firth of —. Go — to war. Henry the —. A — at bridge. Jonathan and John, 1923 “TT don't seem hardly right, John, To anchor off the ledge, © And tempt me to get tight, John, Now I have signed the pledge.” Old Johnny B., “I thought,” says he, “If you were feeling dry, A drop or two of honest brew Would go down just like pie. Here’s how! Have I your eye?” “Look out! Don't talk so loud, John, The folks at home might hear, You know I'm not allowed, John, A glass of wine or beer.” Old Johnny B., “My word,” says he, “You're moral as a judge, = Our English Kings don’t grow no wings, Nor swap our ale for fudge, Or any grape juice sludge.” “It's in the constitution, John, We'll soon clamp down the lid, On smokes and evolution, John, And other things forbid.” Old Johnny B., “Great Scott,” says he, “You stand a lot of guff, T hold in awe a natural law, But not this re-form stuff, Of which you've had enough.” “We've just passed a new law, John, Unless your ships are dry, They cannot touch our shore, John, Nor in our waters ply.” Old Johnny B., “Righto,” says he, “We'll pass a new law too, And it’s my bet, unless they’re wet, Your ships shan’t turn a screw In English waters blue.” “We must enforce the Law, John, The same as you folks do. We set a lot of store, John, On being thought true blue.” Old Johnny B., “That strikes,” says he, “A sympathetic note. But if you're wise, don’t advertise, Your left eye’s little mote, That Southern negro vote.” “We mean to make this land, John, With moral precepts hum, And clearly understand, John, The wickedness of rum.” Says Old John B., “Democracy Should get another name, It-seems to me Hypocrisy Would better suit the same, You'll have to can Miss Liberty and find another dame.” Roger A, Derby. comicbooks.com