Life, 1923-05-17 · page 13 of 46
Life — May 17, 1923 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains satirical poetry and humor rather than political cartoons. "The Wooing of the Amoeba" is a whimsical poem about a lonely amoeba that reproduces asexually—the joke being it becomes "two of us" rather than finding a mate. "What Life Is" lists absurdist life definitions (death as card dealer, football games, etc.), typical of the magazine's humorous style. The illustrated cartoon shows a man surrounded by scattered papers and objects, apparently in chaos—likely depicting domestic disorder or life's complications, though the specific reference is unclear. "Welcome Home" appears to be a timeline of Woodrow Wilson's presidency (1911-1923), cataloging policy reversals and public demands. The page emphasizes Life's satirical approach to modern life, politics, and social absurdities through humor rather than direct commentary.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
LIFE The Wooing of the Ameba (A Movie as Possibly Passed by the Pennsylvania State Board of Censorship.) ESTLING in the sands of time when eternity was N but begun, the first amoeba grew lonely. *e* Long sought the amoeba, but no mate found he, or rather, it. eee Had it found a life partner, there would have come a day of rejoicing, with the mate sewing upon Tiny Gar- ments. ee* Or the stork would have been seen winging its way to the anceba ménage, in its beak a Precious Burden. * KK But the lonesome ameeba simply said to itself, “There are going to be two of us, dear.” eK Dividing in half, the ameeba kept itself company and lived happily ever after. F.D. What Life Is OU take these poems Beginning “This life is but a.” You know— ie of Cards in which Death is the Dealer; thall Game wherein Old Doc Time blows the Referee’s Whistle; A blank sheet of paper; Laid end to end they’d reach to some body of water, Which would suit me fine. If this life were like anything else it’d be terrible. You take these poems telling you what it’s like— Take ’em away. I don’t want ’em, Welcome Home June, 1911I—Made Woodrow Wilson President. August, 1915—Took it back. April, 1922—Took America out of the war except for busi- ness purposes. May, 1922—Put it back in by popular demand. August, 1922—Gave America to England. September, 1922—Took it back by popular demand. October, 1922—Took away women’s souls. November, 1922—Gave them back. January, 1923—Took off long trousers February, 1923—Put them back by popular demand. April, 1923—Ceded Peacham, Vt., to England. There being no great popular objection in America, this single act of the Ambassador will be allowed to stand. Book Lists HE making of many book lists is laborious ; it breeds endless argument and ill-feeling. To reduce the argument and ill-feeling to the minimum, we suggest that the following list be brought to the attention of Mr. H. G. Wells and that he consider the advisability of recall- ing the two lists he has already given us, destroying them, and substituting it in their stead, for it is thought there will be very little difference of opinion with regard to the past, present and future importance of the books that compose it: 1. Pocketbook 6. Old Family Doctor Book 2. Checkbook 7. Telephone Book 3. Cookbook Guest Book 4. The Almanac 9. Social Register 5. Official Baseball Guide 10, Automobile Blue Book Misleading Hunny: Isn't the dinner bell early? Wire: That's not the dinner bell What is it Only our laughter t nt comicbooks.com