Life — December 14, 1922 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

movies and has never heard of Hollywood. Congratulations would seem to be in order. L H. G. Wells was defeated for Parliament. Apparently Mr. Britling saw through it. Now that Wells has been squelched politically, he’ll prob- ably follow the example of Lloyd George and write a book. LL The football season has been a great success. In no other year did the players drive the girl swimming champions out of the rotogravure sections so early. L A book has just been published entitled, “What Prohibition Has Done to America.” This is not nearly so interesting as would be a book on what America has done to Prohibition. LL Baby-kissing is a favorite trick with candidates. It’s lucky for the candidates that babies can’t vote. The royal family of Greece by this time ought to know enough to keep. out of the reign. LL Ambassador Harvey may not know whether women have souls or not, but he has found out they have tongues. LL A woman had her husband arrested because his love for her had cooled. She evidently thought it might grow warmer in the cooler. LL Our country now has a new Congress for General Dawes to pick at. LL Mr. Volstead has been retired to private life and there isn’t a dry eye in the country. LADY in Portland, Me., admits that she has never been to the Well, Henry Cabot Lodge still has the Lowells to talk to. mew SS SENATORIAL SNAPS Reed Smoot ‘OUR qualities, dear Mr. Smoot,ah Well! They are approved by Utah. ‘Whenever Congress is in session You seem your State's complete expression; We feel its breezes and its highness And all its arid desert-dryness , With here and there a touch of sweet- ness Remindful of its sugar-beetness. With tireless tongue you tell the nation Of Utah's need for irrigation Till all the Senate cries, “Have pity. _Go back, we beg, to Salt Lake City! Go back where blaring bands will meet you And flags and flowers and friends will greet you, And arches with inscriptions cheery: “The People’s Choice! Good Mormon, Dearie” GSC. It is unlucky for a man to light three cigarettes with one match, but if a woman lights one cigarette with three matches she is luckier than usual. L | The Society for the Preven- tion of Useless Giving is rais- ing its annual protest against the indiscriminate distribution of Christmas presents. Ne less, the sale of Tie Rac! Cozys and Tooth-Brush Contain- ers seems to be just about as large as ever. L Clemenceau has been observ: ing the workings of Prohibition in this country. No wonder there is a smile on the face of the Tiger. LL The hero who recently tore his telephone loose from _ its moorings, carried it to the home of the telephone operator, and shied it through her window, has one more duty to perform be- fore he dies. He should heave his radiator at the janitor. Was it an antecedent of Dr. Coué that prompted Napoleon to remark in the middle of his Russian campaign, “Every day in every way I am getting Warsaw and Warsaw”? aL A Swedish professor says races decay with prosperity. Over here prosperity decays with races. The newly-arrived spirit was investigating the Beyond. At the main chute to Hell it stood for some time, watching man after man take the jump. One thing in particular the spirit noticed: every man, as_ he started his drop, murmured lightly to himself, “Oh, a little of this sort of thing never hurt anybody.” L The orchards are making a last stand against Prohibition. comicbooks.com